# Best Resume



## StriperAddict (Sep 19, 2012)

This is from an email that's been around a while but one of the best...


*The Resume of Jesus Christ*

*Address:*Ephesians 1:20*
Phone:*Romans 10:13 *
Website:*The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Savior and Jesus

Hello. My name is _Jesus -The Christ_. Many call me Lord! I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking *the top management* position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.
*
Qualifications*

I founded the earth and established the heavens, 
I formed man from the dust of the ground, 
I breathed into humanity the breath of life, 
I redeemed all of humankind, 
The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me 
*
Occupational Background*

I've only had one employer, 
I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful,
My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me 
*
Skills Work Experiences*

Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the brokenhearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, 
I am a Wonderful Counselor. People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, 
Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins, 
*
Educational Background*

I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, .
In me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, .
My Word is so powerful, it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a lamp unto your path, 
I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, 
*Major Accomplishments*

I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, 
I laid down my life so that you may live, .
I defeated the archenemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, 
I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead,
There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.
*
References*

Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healings, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance
*
In Summation*
Now that you've read my resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, and lead you into everlasting life. When can I start? Time is of the essence.
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