# Waiting Till Marriage?



## olchevy

Ok guys first off lets make sure to keep this PG.....

I am simply wanting some insight on your thoughts on waiting till marriage.

 I have been trying my darnedest to wait, even had one girl break up with me over it(That was a hard pill to swallow). And well College is not making it easy, not one bit...As many of you know..lol

Simply put...Why wait?

    Once some girls found out I hadn't yet, it seems like I am some challenge for them or something....I am not kidding you. I am being dead serious.

     I have seen many things saying the only reason it said to wait till marriage was to keep diseases from spreading....And some said since people got married so young usually around 14-15 it was not a problem back then...

And then there is always the, Because the Word says so....Which is what I have been going on....

    But in other aspects It seems that since that is such a important part of life after marriage, that one would think you need to see if you two "match up" and all is well before you get married...

    I mean I am not trying to play it down, but You wouldn't buy a new car that was supposed to be your only car for the rest of your life without at least taking it for a test drive....would you?


  My family is a very good family, we are all Christians and we go to church every Sunday, say prayers every night and before meals together....but even My parents seem to think that is one of the things that you can kinda do anyways, at my age now, although they don't come right out and say it.....

No matter how good we try to be, we are all sinners, so what makes this such a big no no...

And here is one thing I am afraid to ask...But is it ok to do all the "other stuff" to each other except for actual...well you know, or does that fall in the same category? Up to this point I have felt like it did fall in that category and was off limits... 

And frankly everyone knows what people my age will say...

I just want some insight from a more mature crowd.

And as I said above please try and keep this as PG as we can...We all know what we are talking about and there is no reason in using rough language to describe it.


----------



## olcowman

Right now if you do a search for new posts the next post listed goes hand in hand (no penetration, but it's about arrows LOL) It made me do a double take anyhow. Look I was a heathen and didn't wait but it worked out and I have asked for forgiveness. You are obniously a much better man than I was at that point and a fine example of a christain. You know better and have the spirit and conviction to do right here. Keep setting that example and live up to those standards you know that the Lord wishes of us. You don't need none of us to tell you what is 'too far' , he put that answer in your heart and you can feel it. Don't let nobody try and bring you down. This country, and this world for that matter, needs people like you to set examples for all of us and especially our children who we do not wish to follow in our own sorry footsteps always.

Thank you for being the kind of christian I can point out to my children. Your right up there with some good company these days. Tim Tebow has publically addressed the same situation recently, you ain't the only one brother, it might seem like it sometimes... but keep the faith for our sakes. I hate to put pressure on you, but you are doing a lot of good in this world at a time when it is really needed. Stay strong... you maybe called upon again to be one of God's  heroes, he ain't going to let you down.


----------



## olchevy

Thank you.


----------



## SissyHunter

Oldchevy, 
I think you know the answer your searching for here. It takes a man (even a young one) to stand up for their convictions. 

Sounds like you're a smart one. When you find the right young lady, she'll respect you for your ways.


----------



## Israel

You need God to lead you through this minefield.
If you're not cut out for the single life, (and you can ask the Lord about that) then there's nothing wrong with asking him to bless you with a wife.

If you're not willing now...or prepared to be married, then you're just gonna suffer greatly if you go into the dating scene and find yourself in those situations alone with a young woman.
You'll either suffer in trying to resist temptation, or know the regrets later of having given in.
I won't even add the particular stings you invite should she a believer you deflower and abandon. (And if these girls are not believers, of what interest are they to you?)
There's no way around suffering if you have chosen to follow Christ...but he makes it all worthwhile.
A man who is able to contain himself in your situation is more than rare.
I trust God would give you a mate who could be worthy of such a more than rare man.
And you would both be pleased.


----------



## creation's_cause

Once the physical act is being performed, the level of commitment, implied or not is there unless a couple are just down right using one another.  When two are joined together, the act requires the commitment of marriage to be blessed by God.  If you really believe God is leading you to marry a woman, and you have prayed about it, maybe even sought counsel and still believe she is the woman for you, don't worry about the test drive, God is more than faithful to give you the desires of your heart in your mate....He is trustworthy even to the point of creating in your relationship a great love life.  Stay true to Him!!


----------



## ronpasley

Stay true my friend I'm so proud of you I promise God will bless you for your stand, I wish I would have but I fail to my lust of desires and sin.


----------



## vanguard1

I wish i would have waited, I was a virgin untill I was 19 and a so called friend at the time said (if you dont do it, you wont know what it is like, so you wont want it so bad) he was trying to warn me but I did not listen. if you have never been in a 6 seat beachcraft air plane 30.000 feet in the air you dont know what the feeling is like. the fight is 1000 times harder once you have done it, it also has messes with your mind, you become one with that other person and what they have is now part of you(good or bad) so stay strong and know not everybody is doin it, that is a lie. we are very proud of you and glad you are here, God bless you and keep you strong.


----------



## Keith48

vanguard1 said:


> you become one with that other person and waht they have is now part of you(good or bad) so stay strong and know not everybody is doin it, that is a lie. we are very proud of you and glad you are here, God bless you and keep you strong.



Sex was designed by God to be good, and as a married man, I can say that it IS! BUT, the consequences of doing it outside of God's design has great and lasting effects. As Vanguard said, you become one with that person and there is a deep, spiritual connection far beyond the physical that you make. As far as the "other" stuff. That connection can still be made on a spiritual level when someone causes you to orgasm. Look up info on "soul ties." That is the common name for it in Christian circles.

As far as the dating scene - there are girls out there that are waiting until marriage and a lot more than you think there are. When you marry, you are wanting to be with someone that is compatible with you on every level, but especially spiritual, because the sex alone cannot sustain a marriage. Are you looking in the right places? Most girls at college are not going to walk the Christian walk daily, so maybe start looking for girls that do. As far as a "test drive," once the sex drive dies down some, you have to have substance in the relationship for it to last. When hard times come (and they will) in marriage, you have to have something stronger than a bed to keep you together. 

I wish I could say that I waited, but I was not a Christian when I was a teenager. When I met my wife, she had never even kissed a guy before, and she was waiting until marriage, which was great since I had gotten saved and met her at church. We have been married for 14 years, and she has always been the best sex partner I have ever had - by a long ways. You will learn what each other likes and the act of doing those things is done in love and is more fulfilling than you can ever imagine. Most importantly, it is safe (not just diseases) and it is secure, and it has God's blessings on it. Every year that goes by it gets better and better. Maybe I am the oddball, but I am blessed so much in my marriage. But maybe that is because I found a girl that loves Jesus more than she loves me. It's not about going to church and doing "churchy" things - its about a relationship with God and understanding that He wants what is best for us and gives us that. 

Probably my biggest regret in life was that I could not give my wife on our wedding night what she was giving me - a body that was completely mine and had never been seen or touched by another man. There are still a lot of girls out there that are like that if you are looking in the right place. It is worth the wait. If you don't, trust me from someone who knows - you WILL regret it.

Good luck and God's blessings on you! You know what is right in your heart. Stop looking for an out to get around it and accept God's love and blessings on you.


----------



## olchevy

vanguard1 said:


> I wish i would have waited, I was a virgin untill I was 19 and a so called friend at the time said (if you dont do it, you wont know what it is like, so you wont want it so bad) he was trying to warn me but I did not listen. if you have never been in a 6 seat beachcraft air plane 30.000 feet in the air you dont know what the feeling is like. the fight is 1000 times harder once you have done it, it also has messes with your mind, you become one with that other person and what they have is now part of you(good or bad) so stay strong and know not everybody is doin it, that is a lie. we are very proud of you and glad you are here, God bless you and keep you strong.



I know the point you are getting at, but I have been up in a 8 seat Beachcraft Queen Air a few times....My old boss had one, It was an x-military plane, used to escort the generals and such around. But they did not use them long because not long after the fleet of Queen Airs were purchased almost everything switched over to jet engines...He re did the whole interior to where it looked very nice, but if you ever pulled the carpet back there was no doubt it was military plane at one point.He Got it on  a very good deal with Low hours, and used it for personal travel and when he would instruct students going for their twin engine rating...I believe its ceiling was around 26-27K at absolute max though, He had his set up where he could do overseas travel as long as he only had four people, he would take out the extra seats and put in two fuel bladders in their place.... I spent many a hours detailing that plane, and doing basic maintenance to it... Good times.


----------



## olchevy

Thank you everyone.....It doesn't get any easier, but this does help some.


----------



## apoint

Most importantly is to be evenly yoked to your wife. A nonbeliever and a believer is not good, or a false religion married to a Christian.
 Two people have to be walking in the same direction or they will end up in 2 different places with their children confused.


----------



## gtparts

Wow, fellas, what great encouragement you give. I simply could not have said it any better.

olchevy, I will only add this. It is absolute folly to try and compartmentalize your life. Your spiritual life is an integral part of who you are. Your physical life is also. When one aspect gets out of whack, all other aspects are affected. Hard as one might try, sexuality and spirituality are forever linked. 

Your relationship to women, your mother, sister, a female cousin, a girlfriend either reflect the relationship you have to God..... or it does not. 

The one thing that counts in your post is this line.

"And then there is always the, Because the Word says so....Which is what I have been going on...."

Every other perspective offered asks you to compromise your relationship to Christ. Regardless of how they are intended or who offered them, those rationalizations are from the Pit.

Remember....

"Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing."

- A. Lincoln -

If you concentrate on being the best "tree", you needn't worry about the shadow you cast.


----------



## earl

God created man and woman .
God created sex. All kinds. 
God had sexual maturity kick in around 13. 
God said not to spill your seed on the ground.
God clearly intended  man and woman to get together at an early age. 
Waiting so long to get married , no matter how much sense it makes , is clearly perverting God's intentions. Get them kiddies married off quick !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## gtparts

earl said:


> God created man and woman .
> God created sex. All kinds.
> God had sexual maturity kick in around 13.
> God said not to spill your seed on the ground.
> God clearly intended  man and woman to get together at an early age.
> Waiting so long to get married , no matter how much sense it makes , is clearly perverting God's intentions. Get them kiddies married off quick !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Physical maturity, and particularly sexual maturity operate independently of social and emotional maturity. It is better to err on the side of caution. Many personal and familial disasters have resulted from immature and selfish decisions.


----------



## olchevy

earl said:


> God created man and woman .
> God created sex. All kinds.
> God had sexual maturity kick in around 13.
> God said not to spill your seed on the ground.
> God clearly intended  man and woman to get together at an early age.
> Waiting so long to get married , no matter how much sense it makes , is clearly perverting God's intentions. Get them kiddies married off quick !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



So from my understanding your view point, waiting till I find the one I want to spend the rest of my life is "Clearly perverting God's intentions".....

Did I understand your thoughts on that correctly? If I did understand your view point correctly please elaborate on why you believe so. I'm not fussing, I am just confused as I have never heard that point of view before.


----------



## earl

I am not saying to wait or not waait . Simply saying the way our bodies work. Or the way God made them to work. 
I have no idea why he hasn't adjusted the maturity dates to modern standards . To forbid premarital sex and spilling your seed on the ground , and then to make the sex drive so strong as to overcome commonsense , is beyond me . Your God ,Your rules. 
Of course if you followed Judaism , you could get married  to a girl  3 years old .

gt , what you say is true ,now days . 100 years ago marriage was quite common and successful at quite younger days than is common now . The further back you go , the younger the age. Makes you wonder why  ? Is God simply not keeping up maintenance on his creation ?


----------



## olchevy

earl said:


> I am not saying to wait or not waait . Simply saying the way our bodies work. Or the way God made them to work.
> I have no idea why he hasn't adjusted the maturity dates to modern standards . To forbid premarital sex and spilling your seed on the ground , and then to make the sex drive so strong as to overcome commonsense , is beyond me . Your God ,Your rules.
> Of course if you followed Judaism , you could get married  to a girl  3 years old .
> 
> gt , what you say is true ,now days . 100 years ago marriage was quite common and successful at quite younger days than is common now . The further back you go , the younger the age. Makes you wonder why  ? Is God simply not keeping up maintenance on his creation ?



Ok, well thank you for giving me more insight into your ideas....I may not necessarily agree with them, but I respect them....


----------



## vanguard1

my dear friend earl it is clear you don,t know what you are talking about,The minimum age for marriage under Jewish law is 13 for boys, 12 for girls; however, the kiddushin can take place before that, and often did in medieval times. The Talmud recommends that a man marry at age 18, or somewhere between 16 and 24, and taking a scripture out of context  to make it look like you know the bible is very funny to read.


----------



## earl

My dear friend vanguard 1, rather than throw insults that have nothing to do with your level of education , go search the archives . sometime this year, and you will find where I gave all the facts backing up the claims to this truth. You will find that I am indeed correct.


----------



## WTM45

Nothing has tried to make sex more taboo than fundamentalism.

Enjoy dating and learning how to interact with the people of your choice.  When the time is right, you will know it.
Enjoy your freedom to choose.  Be mature.  Be smart.  Be kind.  Be giving.  Do not use it to control or dominate a relationship.
Know what can result from your actions.  Know you can share with someone special that special contact.  It is a good thing, not something to be scared of.


----------



## Throwback

If you think it's hard to wait now, keep this in mind. 

It's a lot easier to wait till marriage period, than to not have waited and try to make up on the next girl and then wait till you are married with HER by agreement. 

T


----------



## FERAL ONE

i was 21 and my bride was 28 olchevy , i look at it as a gift that i fought tooth and nail to give to her and her the same to me. it was so worth the wait ! now there is no one to compare , she is my one and only and i am hers. that has raised our bond to another level i think , knowing the sacrifice that was made before marriage.  now, almost 18 years later i still agree with my decision and am thankful for it. i heard a pastor say the other day that the same thinking that says it is okay to have premarital sex will say it is okay to have extramarital sex. it takes a bit to wrap your mind around that but i agree with him in that statement. stay strong  , it will be right in the long run !


----------



## earl

As folks keep waiting longer and longer to get married , I think 30 may be the new median age, matching up without compromising some of your old parts ,is harder to to do .


----------



## vanguard1

earl said:


> My dear friend vanguard 1, rather than throw insults that have nothing to do with your level of education , go search the archives . sometime this year, and you will find where I gave all the facts backing up the claims to this truth. You will find that I am indeed correct.



Of course if you followed Judaism , you could get married to a girl 3 years old .

this is what you just said and it is not the truth.

the truth is:The minimum age for marriage under Jewish law is 13 for boys, 12 for girls; however, the kiddushin can take place before that, and often did in medieval times. The Talmud recommends that a man marry at age 18, or somewhere between 16 and 24


----------



## eaglegrad07

olchevy, I went through the same time in college it sounds like you are going through not very long ago.  I did not meet my wife until after I graduated, and I can tell you that while in the moment there were some very hard times along the way, but I would not change any of it for the relationship my wife and I have now, and what it has done for our communal relationship with Christ.  Stay strong brother.


----------



## olchevy

FERAL ONE said:


> i was 21 and my bride was 28 olchevy , i look at it as a gift that i fought tooth and nail to give to her and her the same to me. it was so worth the wait ! now there is no one to compare , she is my one and only and i am hers. that has raised our bond to another level i think , knowing the sacrifice that was made before marriage.  now, almost 18 years later i still agree with my decision and am thankful for it. i heard a pastor say the other day that the same thinking that says it is okay to have premarital sex will say it is okay to have extramarital sex. it takes a bit to wrap your mind around that but i agree with him in that statement. stay strong  , it will be right in the long run !



That right there really struck me....Like one of those Ah Ha moments....It just really clicked for me why I am doing what I am doing.

And I thank you for that...


----------



## apoint

FERAL ONE said:


> i was 21 and my bride was 28 olchevy , i look at it as a gift that i fought tooth and nail to give to her and her the same to me. it was so worth the wait ! now there is no one to compare , she is my one and only and i am hers. that has raised our bond to another level i think , knowing the sacrifice that was made before marriage.  now, almost 18 years later i still agree with my decision and am thankful for it. i heard a pastor say the other day that the same thinking that says it is okay to have premarital sex will say it is okay to have extramarital sex. it takes a bit to wrap your mind around that but i agree with him in that statement. stay strong  , it will be right in the long run !



 That just needed to be repeated. Thank You.


----------



## Arrow3

Gatorb said:


> don't worry... you're "parts" and her "parts" will "match up".



"you're" means You are.....  Hasn't Etter taught you anything?


----------



## wilber85

I would really like to see some statistics regarding couples who decided to wait and what the divorce percentage is...

I have chosen not to wait til marriage.  That said, I am extremely lucky in the fact that me and my first girlfriend are still together after 10 years and will probably marry.  It is a VERY good feeling to know that you each have only been with one person.  The thought of being with a woman who has slept with another man is extremely unappealing to me. 


I am not a religious man, so my reply might not be what you are looking for, but there are definitely reasons outside of religion to find another woman who has not been with someone else.  So, yes, it is worth the wait unless you get lucky and know you will be together forever.


----------



## chiefsquirrel83

i will make a confession...I didn't...and I wish I did....I made a lot of mistakes in my life but I have worn knees from asking forgiveness. My wife....waited...and she knows about the dents and dings in my life but she accepts me for who I am and we now both follow Christ together!


----------



## Reece2

From someone around your age.... Wait. 

I will say that I didn't and I regret it. Since that time the good Lord has opened my eyes to alot of things and let me know that it was something I shouldn't be doing. I knew that before, but as you know its tough when that is what everyone else is focused on. At least in our age group. The temptation is terrible. Its been 2 years since "that time" and I dont plan on changing that anytime soon. Yes it may be hard to do and hard to find someone that understands and respects your decision, but when the time is right you'll have that person. 

Pray about it and do what YOU believe and feel is the right thing and dont worry about everyone else. God will help you along the way if you'll just trust him


----------



## Ronnie T

There are an awful lot of relatonship problems that never arise when the issue of sex is not allow to complicated an otherwise loving relationship.


----------



## earl

vanguard1 said:


> Of course if you followed Judaism , you could get married to a girl 3 years old .
> 
> this is what you just said and it is not the truth.
> 
> the truth is:The minimum age for marriage under Jewish law is 13 for boys, 12 for girls; however, the kiddushin can take place before that, and often did in medieval times. The Talmud recommends that a man marry at age 18, or somewhere between 16 and 24



I stand by what I said . Look it up.


----------



## gtparts

earl said:


> I stand by what I said . Look it up.



I did..... and found nothing to support the 3 yr. old minimum age for brides that you mention. Perhaps you are thinking about a different time in the the history of Jewish marriages, but current custom is a minimum of 13 for boys and 12 for girls, while it is recommended that males wait till 18. If you can direct me to your source, I would be appreciative.

gtparts


----------



## formula1

*Re:*

Old Chevy:

In a world where relationships are cheap and challenges are real ( you're in college so I understand), I commend you for standing firm to you convictions.  It is very refreshing.

You simply don't know how much it could mean to a future, lasting, God-given relationship the Lord Himself has prepared just for you. I say this after 27 years of wonderful marriage. It may be very challenging now, but the reward will indeed be endless.  

God provided for you to have a lasting relationship with one woman.  Sure you can fail and God will forgive as many have attested, but why go there if you don't have to.  It is much better to have not sinned than to face the consequences of it.  Stand firm!

Ephesians 6
11 Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12 For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. 13 Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.


----------



## earl

Sanhedrin 55b: "What if a Jew committed bestiality in ignorance; must there have been a stumbling block and degradation (for the animal to be stoned) and in this case there is only degredation, but no sin; or perhaps for degradation alone without there having been a stumbling block (the animal is stoned)? . . . A maiden aged three years and one day may be acquired in marriage by coition, and if her deceased husband's brother cohabits with her, she becomes his" (emphasis added).

I left out the controversial Yebamoth 59b  or the Judaic pervert law as it is sometimes called .All it requires is Google. Also left out the one that makes beastiality OK. The Talmud is quite the racy read.


----------



## vanguard1

earl said:


> Sanhedrin 55b: "What if a Jew committed bestiality in ignorance; must there have been a stumbling block and degradation (for the animal to be stoned) and in this case there is only degredation, but no sin; or perhaps for degradation alone without there having been a stumbling block (the animal is stoned)? . . . A maiden aged three years and one day may be acquired in marriage by coition, and if her deceased husband's brother cohabits with her, she becomes his" (emphasis added).
> 
> I left out the controversial Yebamoth 59b  or the Judaic pervert law as it is sometimes called .All it requires is Google. Also left out the one that makes beastiality OK. The Talmud is quite the racy read.



Exodus 22:19 (King James Version)

 19Whosoever lieth with a beast shall surely be put to death.

Leviticus 18:23 (King James Version)

 23Neither shalt thou lie with any beast to defile thyself therewith: neither shall any woman stand before a beast to lie down thereto: it is confusion.

Leviticus 20:15 (King James Version)

 15And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast

Deuteronomy 27:21 (King James Version)

 21Cursed be he that lieth with any manner of beast. And all the people shall say, Am

that is from the hewbrew. the talmud is not the law


----------



## earl

Those books are not in the Torah or the talmud. See ,you had to go to the Christian version to dispute what I said . I never brought the bible into the discussion. 

Perhaps you would like to explain what the Talmud is for and how it is used since you know so much about it . And try to stay within the boundaries of Judaism . Once you bring in the bible , you change the conversation to an entirely different subject .

The Talmud lists several cases where bestiality is acceptable. Also cases where the animal is not to be stoned. 

I also noticed you seem to have backed off on your claim about 3 year olds. It is odd what you find when you do more than a halfway job of searching .


----------



## johnnylightnin

If you find yourself saying, "Yeah, the Bible says it but..."

That "but"  is you trying to justify something.  I know, I was a college guy trying to wait once too.

For me it comes down to this, either the Scripture is sufficient or it's not.  If God is who is revealed in the Bible, he doesn't tell me to wait because he wants me to be miserable.  He tells me to wait because this is his design and he knows how it is best used.  You gotta trust him on this just like you trust him on everything else.

I waited and there has NEVER been a time that I regretted it.


----------



## olchevy

Thank you guys....I am actually surprised to see so many did wait.... For the longest time it seemed as though I was the only one to attempting it,everyone else seem to be trying to see who could get some first...lol


----------



## Taporsnap77

wow i kinda want to feel sorry for you at first but then the other part of me looks up to you for feeling so strong about something and keeping to it. For me no but if that is what floats your boat man stay your course. LOL i will say im glad u said a girl almost broke up with you bc of it or i would say most pple that do this have no game and not many chances at girls.


----------



## gtparts

earl said:


> Those books are not in the Torah or the talmud. See ,you had to go to the Christian version to dispute what I said . I never brought the bible into the discussion.
> 
> Perhaps you would like to explain what the Talmud is for and how it is used since you know so much about it . And try to stay within the boundaries of Judaism . Once you bring in the bible , you change the conversation to an entirely different subject .
> 
> The Talmud lists several cases where bestiality is acceptable. Also cases where the animal is not to be stoned.
> 
> I also noticed you seem to have backed off on your claim about 3 year olds. It is odd what you find when you do more than a halfway job of searching .



earl, you really need to do your homework.

The Torah IS the first five books of the OT.

Genesis
Exodus
Leviticus
Numbers
Deuteronomy


Everything quoted by vanguard1 is part of the Torah. You nor anyone else can quote from the Torah without also quoting from the the first five books of the Bible. They are one and the same!


----------



## Taporsnap77

I think my view goes along with old teds saying....lol WHACK UM AND STACK UM...unless of course u find the one and then i dont approve of cheating


----------



## olchevy

Taporsnap77 said:


> I think my view goes along with old teds saying....lol WHACK UM AND STACK UM...unless of course u find the one and then i dont approve of cheating



No I can think of four right now that would have been sure things, and a pretty sure fifth one....Heck the girl I ride back an forth to college with now, I know would if I even hinted at it.....lol

I am just trying....I am not saying I will last that long, but I sure am trying my hardest....

By the way is that an ar-15 in your avatar, its hard to see....If so what upper are you running on it?


----------



## vanguard1

earl said:


> Those books are not in the Torah or the talmud. See ,you had to go to the Christian version to dispute what I said . I never brought the bible into the discussion.
> 
> Perhaps you would like to explain what the Talmud is for and how it is used since you know so much about it . And try to stay within the boundaries of Judaism . Once you bring in the bible , you change the conversation to an entirely different subject .
> 
> The Talmud lists several cases where bestiality is acceptable. Also cases where the animal is not to be stoned.
> 
> I also noticed you seem to have backed off on your claim about 3 year olds. It is odd what you find when you do more than a halfway job of searching .



In interpreting the Law of Moses, the Pharisees overstepped their bounds by inserting the traditions of their fathers in place of God’s holy law, and were summarily condemned by the Lord for their actions. Though Jesus preached against this Pharisaical traditionalism throughout His earthly ministry, the Judaism practiced today is based almost exclusively upon it. What Jesus called the “traditions of men” is now known as “rabbinicalism,” and is grounded firmly in the extrabiblical writings of the Talmud.

 Apologetics Press :: Scripturally Speaking  

What is the Jewish Talmud? 
by Alden Bass


----------



## earl

I do love the dictionary . It leaves opinion at the door.

Merriam Webster

Tal·mud noun \Ëˆtäl-ËŒmuÌ‡d, Ëˆtal-mÉ™d\
Definition of TALMUD

: the authoritative body of Jewish tradition comprising the Mishnah and Gemara
â€” Tal·mu·dic adjective
â€” tal·mud·ism noun often capitalized
Origin of TALMUD

Late Hebrew talmÅ«dh, literally, instruction
First Known Use: 1532

Marriage to a 3 year  included.

gt, if that's the case , and I acknowledge it is. , why not quote the Torah  ?


----------



## vanguard1

again my good friend EARL. (choke) lol  the talmud is not the law of GOD.


----------



## gtparts

earl said:


> I do love the dictionary . It leaves opinion at the door.
> 
> Merriam Webster
> 
> Tal·mud noun \Ëˆtäl-ËŒmuÌ‡d, Ëˆtal-mÉ™d\
> Definition of TALMUD
> 
> : the authoritative body of Jewish tradition comprising the Mishnah and Gemara
> â€” Tal·mu·dic adjective
> â€” tal·mud·ism noun often capitalized
> Origin of TALMUD
> 
> Late Hebrew talmÅ«dh, literally, instruction
> First Known Use: 1532
> 
> Marriage to a 3 year  included.
> 
> gt, if that's the case , and I acknowledge it is. , why not quote the Torah  ?



When one quotes anything from the first five books of the Bible they ARE quoting the Torah. Why bother to make a distinction? There is none.


----------



## Huntinfool

> since that is such a important part of life after marriage



CLEARLY.....you aren't married.


----------



## olchevy

Huntinfool said:


> CLEARLY.....you aren't married.



Yeah after I put that up, I was thinking someone would reply like that...lol

I am a little worried, I always hear people say you don't get any after you get married....That is some seriously disheartening news, for a guy trying his darnedest to wait till marriage....lol


----------



## Luke0927

Huntinfool said:


> CLEARLY.....you aren't married.



Aint that the truth ! (why are we laughing at ourselves) 2 Kids put a stop to that and I'm in my mid 20s and already on the quarterly basis


Just don't jump into having kids to fast and you should be OK, if you can wait good for you, only thing I may could see is what if you find a girl that for what ever reason is not a virgin but you are in love would you not marry her or now look down on her ( I mean do you ask her before you start to date?)?  Maybe she was with one guy she thought she was going to matter but it didn't work out? is she now big Wh... or Sl..


----------



## Huntinfool

olchevy said:


> Yeah after I put that up, I was thinking someone would reply like that...lol
> 
> I am a little worried, I always hear people say you don't get any after you get married....That is some seriously disheartening news, for a guy trying his darnedest to wait till marriage....lol



It's just a married guy joke.  Don't worry.  Marry the right girl and you'll be just fine.  If you want the advice from someone who waited (I was 24 when I got married)...it's worth it.  I'll say it again...it's worth it.  Don't let others dictate their beliefs to you.  You know what you believe and why.  Follow through.


----------



## VisionCasting

Of all the promiscuous folks I know, not one of them ever sit around reminiscing and comparing notes with their spouse about their pre-marital 'activities'.  Marry someone who held themselves to your same high standard, putting God, not peer pressure, first.  And you and your wife will reap the long term benefit of it.


----------



## hoppie

I can honestly say I wish I would have made it to marriage. I was a few years into college and Christian and trying to hold on to my convictions. One night of putting myself in bad situations led to 20 years down the drain. Plus once it happens you can't have it back and it is slippery slope to more issues. People don't talk about it, but as in the Bible it talks about two become one and that is meant for marriage. Following the breakup (because with sex comes a whole new ball of wax and problems) it was like a chunk of me was gone. The worst part of the whole situation is telling your spouse they were not your first.

I have been married a couple years now and will tell you it is not as fast and furious as things started out because things slow down, but when you are with the person you are supposed to be with there is more to it than sex (not much) just kidding, but honestly if you can make it then I suggest it. 

To your comment about aren't we just sinners anyway. Yes, but you shouldn't willingly commit a sin knowing that you are doing it. Things always seem more gratifying when you work harder and wait longer for them. Like not drinking a coke for a year and then getting a large McDonald's coke. ahhhhhhhh


----------



## olchevy

See thats the thing though....as I stated above I am not saying I am a perfect christian I have done some stuff I know I shouldn't have, and not done some stuff I should have.

This is one thing that I feel very strongly about, but to be honest. Those super Godly/Righteous people kinda get on my nerves....which I know is bad to say, but it is the truth...

And a lot of the girls that are waiting for the same reason I am are that way...and well I couldn't put up with that.

I hope that does not come off sounding to harsh, but its the truth about how I feel....


----------



## olchevy

Luke0927 said:


> Aint that the truth ! (why are we laughing at ourselves) 2 Kids put a stop to that and I'm in my mid 20s and already on the quarterly basis
> 
> 
> Just don't jump into having kids to fast and you should be OK, if you can wait good for you, only thing I may could see is what if you find a girl that for what ever reason is not a virgin but you are in love would you not marry her or now look down on her ( I mean do you ask her before you start to date?)?  Maybe she was with one guy she thought she was going to matter but it didn't work out? is she now big Wh... or Sl..



Hmmmm.....I really haven't thought about it....i want to say it wouldn't matter at that point....but I know it might be one of those things in the back of your head....

As of now I would say it wouldn't matter to me.


----------



## emtguy

you wait because you were raised right...you wait b/c you want your wife to be a virgin and she expects the same...you wait because god will honor your sacrifice and find you a matching mate..you wait because a mans no better than his character when no ones watching....you wait because its the right thing to do...


----------



## olchevy

Thank you EMT......


----------



## FishHunt

I met my wife 10 years after my first sexual experience.  We've been (faithfully) married now for 25 years.  I've never regretted the pre-marital relationships I had prior to meeting my wife.  Those relationships helped make me into the person I am today.  If you want to wait there's nothing at all wrong with that.  I commend you for it.  But in the end it's your choice and you shouldn't feel pressured either way.


----------



## Six million dollar ham

I see no compelling reason to wait.  I don't advocate casual stands and flings but in a committed relationship there's no issue, imho, as long as both parties want the same thing (and are of legal age).  That said, don't make it your mission to go and get it.  But with the right person if it gets to that point, making sure there's proper protection in place, if it gets to that point make it count!


----------



## vanguard1

Six million dollar ham said:


> I see no compelling reason to wait.  I don't advocate casual stands and flings but in a committed relationship there's no issue, imho, as long as both parties want the same thing (and are of legal age).  That said, don't make it your mission to go and get it.  But with the right person if it gets to that point, making sure there's proper protection in place, if it gets to that point make it count!



marriage is the only way to have a (committed) relationship.


----------



## creation's_cause

Six million dollar ham said:


> I see no compelling reason to wait.  I don't advocate casual stands and flings but in a committed relationship there's no issue, imho, as long as both parties want the same thing (and are of legal age).  That said, don't make it your mission to go and get it.  But with the right person if it gets to that point, making sure there's proper protection in place, if it gets to that point make it count!



All I can say is....Consider the source!


----------



## Six million dollar ham

vanguard1 said:


> marriage is the only way to have a (committed) relationship.



"Ways to have a committed relationship" is not the topic of this thread, fwiw.


----------



## Six million dollar ham

creation's_cause said:


> All I can say is....Consider the source!



Thanks.  If the kid's open-minded enough to ask such a question then I would imagine he'll do just that.  

Also, fwiw, I noticed you're one of only a few people who just answered the question without using it as an opportunity to detail their own history.  Good for you.


----------



## Lead Poison

Don't listen to *anyone* who says it is alright or up to you. God will bless you for waiting....period!

You are doing the right thing and I commend you for it. 

As for some of the _advice?_ you have been given, it is straight from the devil.


----------



## Six million dollar ham

Lead Poison said:


> As for some of the _advice?_ you have been given, it is straight from the devil.


----------



## vanguard1

Six million dollar ham said:


> "Ways to have a committed relationship" is not the topic of this thread, fwiw.



hey you said it first, judge yourself.


----------



## sqhunter

FERAL ONE said:


> i was 21 and my bride was 28 olchevy , i look at it as a gift that i fought tooth and nail to give to her and her the same to me. it was so worth the wait ! now there is no one to compare , she is my one and only and i am hers. that has raised our bond to another level i think , knowing the sacrifice that was made before marriage.  now, almost 18 years later i still agree with my decision and am thankful for it. i heard a pastor say the other day that the same thinking that says it is okay to have premarital sex will say it is okay to have extramarital sex. it takes a bit to wrap your mind around that but i agree with him in that statement. stay strong  , it will be right in the long run !



I'm with Feral one on this one.  Not many men these days can say their wife is their one and only when it comes to sex.  I was 26 and my wife has always been my one and only and I am proud of that.  I can honestly say she is the best I have ever had.  I tell her that on occasion and while she knows its true it always gets a laugh because she knows that it is true.


----------



## sqhunter

Also said:
			
		

> I think giving a history good or bad gives some validity to an individuals argument.  We all learn from our experiences good or bad.  If we can help others through our experience they may not make the same mistakes.  I believe oldchevy will make the right choice.  Seems to me he has so far.
> 
> Just remember it won't get any easier as Satan is always looking for an inroad to your soul.  Hang in there and lean on Christ.


----------



## Six million dollar ham

sqhunter said:


> If we can help others through our experience they may not make the same mistakes.



Mistakes?  Geeze.


----------



## olchevy

After going through this thread and seeing every ones replies. I thank you.

However now it brings up another question...........











Would it be wrong at all if I was to marry a girl that had not waited....even if she had changed and was on the right path, would that be ok?

Or would I be setting myself up for martial problems later down the road?


----------



## Ronnie T

olchevy said:


> After going through this thread and seeing every ones replies. I thank you.
> 
> However now it brings up another question...........
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Would it be wrong at all if I was to marry a girl that had not waited....even if she had changed and was on the right path, would that be ok?
> 
> Or would I be setting myself up for martial problems later down the road?



It would only be a marital problem if you developed some sort of resentment for her in the weeks and years to come.

Otherwise, remember that you're not going to find a perfect person to marry.  And your wife will not have a perfect husband...... correct.
I'd say, go for the lady that God would most like to see you with and everything else will work out.


----------



## ted_BSR

Ronnie T said:


> It would only be a marital problem if you developed some sort of resentment for her in the weeks and years to come.
> 
> Otherwise, remember that you're not going to find a perfect person to marry.  And your wife will not have a perfect husband...... correct.
> I'd say, go for the lady that God would most like to see you with and everything else will work out.



Consider this with thoughtful prayer.

When you have sex with someone, an undeniable, unrevocable bond is made.  That person becomes a part of you.  There are emotional and spiritual connections that cannot be broken, even if you don't believe it, deny it, say it isn't true or laugh at it. There is no perfect formula because God forgives all sin, but, you can save yourself some difficult times by abiding His law.  Stay the course.


----------



## olchevy

ted_BSR said:


> Consider this with thoughtful prayer.
> 
> When you have sex with someone, an undeniable, unrevocable bond is made.  That person becomes a part of you.  There are emotional and spiritual connections that cannot be broken, even if you don't believe it, deny it, say it isn't true or laugh at it. There is no perfect formula because God forgives all sin, but, you can save yourself some difficult times by abiding His law.  Stay the course.



Well put...thank you both


----------



## Israel

olchevy said:


> After going through this thread and seeing every ones replies. I thank you.
> 
> However now it brings up another question...........
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Would it be wrong at all if I was to marry a girl that had not waited....even if she had changed and was on the right path, would that be ok?
> 
> Or would I be setting myself up for martial problems later down the road?





If you marry a believer, whose past is now gone because she is the woman God has prepared for you...yes...you will have problems...but you will also have grace as you abide in the faith that she is yours to care for to deal with them.

If you marry someone in doubt, even if she is a virgin, yes, you will have problems...

My silly way of saying...if you marry...you will have problems. There are always tests for the believer..,we are never exempt from those...married or single.
Jesus was tested, and those tests were not due to disobedience, but precisely because he obeyed his Father.
So, please, if you can get past the "sailing off into the sunset" mentality...
When you take a wife, you are taking on a large part of caring intimately for a soul...and you will discover how ill equipped you are for that...but, if you seek grace, how well equipped Jesus is for it.

We can never do things "right enough" to avoid problems...that's not it, God is doing something far greater than just getting us to try and do things right...He is making us "right".

Even if you do it all wrong, marry for all the wrong reasons...God is able...but the question is, why fall into a deep hole purposely (by ignoring God) when you can close your eyes, trust God and keep walking...absolutely sure that anything he leads you into he will lead you through.
Lord knows the deep holes of my own choosing I dove right into, and my own voice echoed in the darkness, not because God delayed, but because I had to come to the point where I understood asking for help had far more to do with walking dependent on someone else instead of just getting lifted out of a pit so I could again go on my (not so) merry way.


----------



## olchevy

Thank you Israel...

I do understand no matter what there will be problems regardless, and working at them together are what would make the marriage grow stronger.

I just would like to avoid any problems I can....Like you said "why fall into a deep hole purposely (by ignoring God) when you can close your eyes, trust God and keep walking...absolutely sure that anything he leads you into he will lead you through."

and by the way I like your signature....


----------



## schleylures

olchevy I do not normally post on here, I will think about you often and keep you in my prayers. Best wishes in your course. A lot of good points given.
 I believe you had the answr that was right for you before you even asked the first question. 
 Do not second guess yourself.


----------



## ev239

As someone who walked in your shoes and fell...once before getting back up, my view is that if the woman you find your heart with has repented her failings and turned a new leaf then please don't deny yourself a repentant & forgiven sinner.  We are all sinners, but it takes a true believer to change their ways and repent.

I'm proud of you and think you are a very brave man for putting yourself out there like this.  Remember, waiting till marriage isn't about you at all!  It's about your future wife.  You are preparing the gift of your virginity which you will give to her on your wedding night.  What other gift can top that!


----------



## olchevy

ev239 said:


> As someone who walked in your shoes and fell...once before getting back up, my view is that if the woman you find your heart with has repented her failings and turned a new leaf then please don't deny yourself a repentant & forgiven sinner.  We are all sinners, but it takes a true believer to change their ways and repent.
> 
> I'm proud of you and think you are a very brave man for putting yourself out there like this.  Remember, waiting till marriage isn't about you at all!  It's about your future wife.  You are preparing the gift of your virginity which you will give to her on your wedding night.  What other gift can top that!



An awesome Honeymoon overseas wouldn't hurt at all......lol


----------



## olchevy

schleylures said:


> olchevy I do not normally post on here, I will think about you often and keep you in my prayers. Best wishes in your course. A lot of good points given.
> I believe you had the answr that was right for you before you even asked the first question.
> Do not second guess yourself.



I knew that I knew the right answer before hand, I just wanted to hear it from some other people, since everyone I know either laughs or looks at me like I am crazy when I say that.......I never talk about it, but if people bring it up I don't lie about it either.


----------



## Ronnie T

I admire the fact that you are living your Christian live in a proactive way.  You aren't living like many of us did.  You've set goals and purposed in your heart to live up to the standards taught in God's word.  So many of us, then and now, have become far too comfortable in accepting our flaws and weaknesses.

You are making decisions and sticking with them.

And I pray God will bless you in your future.
And I know He will.


----------



## FishingAddict

My wife is the only one I've "walked" with.  

Now given, I pretty much could tell if I was going to be able to put up with a girl on the first or second date, and after that, I stopped asking her out.  Either that, or the girl pretty much could tell whether or not she could put up with me, and she'd stop agreeing to go out with me.

My wife and I had dated for about a year before we "walked" together. We were not married, but I knew she was the one.  When I told her that I was waiting to have sex until I was married, she was cool with that...but after a year, I KNEW she was the one for me, and had no doubts.  So, I kinda let it happen. 

And I'm so very glad that I did wait.

Oh, if you are worried about "not being good" if you have only "walked" with on woman...well, if you pay attention to her mind, and all of her body (not just the parts you er...are interested in,) the physical part of the relationship will be quite amazing for both of ya... and I'll leave it at that.


----------



## FishingAddict

Oh yeah, another benefit of waiting....I knew more than one person in college who was practicing safe sex...but the protection failed, and they ended up pregnant.  Not something you probably want to deal with at your age, esp if you have only been dating the girl for a couple months. 

Like I tell my kids when I make a rule up...there is a reason for the rule, it will make your life better in the future... Much like the rules of the Bible- it's only going to help you by following them.


----------



## Throwback

olchevy said:


> Yeah after I put that up, I was thinking someone would reply like that...lol
> 
> I am a little worried, I always hear people say you don't get any after you get married....That is some seriously disheartening news, for a guy trying his darnedest to wait till marriage....lol





Oh no..when you get married you get all you want and then some. get married tomorrow and find out...HURRY! 

T

PS YOU MARRIED YET? HURRY!!


----------



## Throwback

You married yet???

T


----------



## Israel

Brother, you've received great advice on here, and everyone has had your best interest at heart in their words.
There's one thing I am sure everyone can agree on, and in the end it will always prove to be the one thing that will be of most value to you, and that is, have as much intercourse with the Lord as you can bear, morning, noon, and night, and in the middle of the night if and when he wakes you.
I'd mentioned in my first response that only the Lord will get you through this minefield, and I am afraid I may have left the impression it is more applicable to premarital relationships than the whole of the world. But it is not. You are being tested in a certain "area", but really, that area is just a test, not as to whether you will have sex or not, but whether you will abide in the Lord.
All you go through will give you opportunity to understand the one who said "for their sakes I sanctify myself" and will give you much wisdom and discernment about walking in every other test you may endure.
The world wants something from you, something "out" of you, to count your seed as something for your own pleasure, but that life giving sperma of God, the spirit of life that is in Christ Jesus, is in you for a greater purpose.
Neither squander nor withold except as the Lord directs, and,  as bread given in due season, it will be both great joy to you, and may well indeed mean life to others.


----------



## Throwback

you married yet??  

T


----------



## olchevy

Throwback said:


> you married yet??
> 
> T



Ha, not yet! And I am not rushing things either, it will happen when it happens.....


----------



## pnome

olchevy said:


> Ok guys first off lets make sure to keep this PG.....
> 
> I am simply wanting some insight on your thoughts on waiting till marriage.
> 
> I have been trying my darnedest to wait, even had one girl break up with me over it(That was a hard pill to swallow). And well College is not making it easy, not one bit...As many of you know..lol
> 
> Simply put...Why wait?
> 
> Once some girls found out I hadn't yet, it seems like I am some challenge for them or something....I am not kidding you. I am being dead serious.
> 
> I have seen many things saying the only reason it said to wait till marriage was to keep diseases from spreading....And some said since people got married so young usually around 14-15 it was not a problem back then...
> 
> And then there is always the, Because the Word says so....Which is what I have been going on....
> 
> But in other aspects It seems that since that is such a important part of life after marriage, that one would think you need to see if you two "match up" and all is well before you get married...
> 
> I mean I am not trying to play it down, but You wouldn't buy a new car that was supposed to be your only car for the rest of your life without at least taking it for a test drive....would you?
> 
> 
> My family is a very good family, we are all Christians and we go to church every Sunday, say prayers every night and before meals together....but even My parents seem to think that is one of the things that you can kinda do anyways, at my age now, although they don't come right out and say it.....
> 
> No matter how good we try to be, we are all sinners, so what makes this such a big no no...
> 
> And here is one thing I am afraid to ask...But is it ok to do all the "other stuff" to each other except for actual...well you know, or does that fall in the same category? Up to this point I have felt like it did fall in that category and was off limits...
> 
> And frankly everyone knows what people my age will say...
> 
> I just want some insight from a more mature crowd.
> 
> And as I said above please try and keep this as PG as we can...We all know what we are talking about and there is no reason in using rough language to describe it.




I look at "waiting till marriage" the same way I look at vegetarianism.

Sure, it's a fine position to take, makes you feel smug, but boy oh boy are you missing out!


----------



## bob28

You by cars without test driving them?


----------



## Huntinfool

bob28 said:


> You by cars without test driving them?



Compare your wife to a car....to her face....and let me know how that works out for ya.


----------



## bob28

Huntinfool said:


> Compare your wife to a car....to her face....and let me know how that works out for ya.




She's a smoking hot Ferrari with racing tires!  Candy apple red paint too


----------



## FishingAddict

bob28 said:


> You by cars without test driving them?



So sex is the most important thing, or one of the biggest concerns you're worried about in a relationship you are going to have for life?

Point being, that's a cop out.  You can find out if you have chemistry with out having sex.

But as far as the car comment, I did buy my last new car (Honda Odyssey)  with out a test drive.  I knew enough people who loved the ride enough that I didn't need to check it out.  Of course, this is not a good procedure for finding a woman to marry.


----------



## olchevy

FishingAddict said:


> So sex is the most important thing, or one of the biggest concerns you're worried about in a relationship you are going to have for life?
> 
> Point being, that's a cop out.  You can find out if you have chemistry with out having sex.
> 
> But as far as the car comment, I did buy my last new car (Honda Odyssey)  with out a test drive.  I knew enough people who loved the ride enough that I didn't need to check it out.  Of course, this is not a good procedure for finding a woman to marry.



Yeah I think If I knew enough people who loved the "ride" with her enough, so much that I didn't even wonder..... I think I would need to be looking elsewhere....lol


----------



## Tim L

earl said:


> God created man and woman .
> God said not to spill your seed on the ground.
> QUOTE]
> 
> That one has always made me wonder....I always took it to mean, lets see whats a nice way of saying....don't whup your jimdog...That's what it seems to say to me...But why would God care one way or the other about that?


----------



## schleylures

FERAL ONE said:


> i was 21 and my bride was 28 olchevy , i look at it as a gift that i fought tooth and nail to give to her and her the same to me. it was so worth the wait ! now there is no one to compare , she is my one and only and i am hers. that has raised our bond to another level i think , knowing the sacrifice that was made before marriage.  now, almost 18 years later i still agree with my decision and am thankful for it. i heard a pastor say the other day that the same thinking that says it is okay to have premarital sex will say it is okay to have extramarital sex. it takes a bit to wrap your mind around that but i agree with him in that statement. stay strong  , it will be right in the long run !




Ol chevy this is the best of them all in my opion. My opion will not help you though. I give you my prayers. 
 You know what is best, FOR YOU.


----------



## earl

Rouster said:


> earl said:
> 
> 
> 
> God created man and woman .
> God said not to spill your seed on the ground.
> QUOTE]
> 
> That one has always made me wonder....I always took it to mean, lets see whats a nice way of saying....don't whup your jimdog...That's what it seems to say to me...But why would God care one way or the other about that?
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> 
> Micro management .
> 
> As far as marriage being the only way , I think Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russel are but one of many examples that a piece of paper won't keep you together . And that your first won't be your last every time.
Click to expand...


----------



## gtparts

Might help if you place yourself in the position of being the parent of a daughter. I'm not sure you would condone her giving samples for the sake of finding out about sexual compatibility. It might sound reasonable to the unthinking or gullible, but it is no sure sign of commitment for a lifetime. Such would only indicate the ability to copulate, something the vast majority of the population can accomplish and rarely a determining factor in the quality of a long term relationship like marriage. 

Stick to what you know is right. You'll not regret it.


----------



## FishHunt

gtparts said:


> Might help if you place yourself in the position of being the parent of a daughter......



As men we tend to expect more restraint from females.   No doubt a double standard, but something ingrained in us.  Our way of trying to protect I think...


----------



## ted_BSR

bob28 said:


> She's a smoking hot Ferrari with racing tires!  Candy apple red paint too



Ask her if anyone ever took it out for a test drive.

It'll be parked for awhile.


----------



## PWalls

johnnylightnin said:


> I waited and there has NEVER been a time that I regretted it.



Same here. 25 years old at the time. Lived through all the funny looks and disparaging comments. Lord has blessed me with the same woman that He allowed me to wait on for the past 15 years now. No regrets.


----------



## olchevy

Good to hear...


----------



## mikel

olchevy..i dont know you from adams house cat but i admire you..you stick to your convictions and follow the plan God has laid out for you and you'll be just fine


----------



## bob28

Gabassmaster said:


> yall leave ole poor bob alone... he is prob a lonely 40 year old with no one to love because he tried to bang them before they got emotionally attatched and they all broke up with him... and she is probably more like a school bus with faded trim who's milage is in the 300,000 from all the guys who took a test drive in her.



It could be worse.  I could be that crusty 6' 140lbs trailer trash that wouldn't know what it was if she sat on my face dude in your avatar....hope that's not you man.  I'd fix that.

This guy scares me.  It say's Carrollton, but you can never be too sure.  He looks like one of those guys that hang around playgrounds....  http://www.familywatchdog.us/


----------



## Gabassmaster

I actually build playgrounds for a living.


----------



## Gabassmaster




----------



## SarahFair

Its nice to hear of a guy who waits. It shows he has morals and values. If a girl _really_ knows what she is looking for she will love you and wont take it as a challenge. That kind of girl is will want to do nothing but tear you down for the rest of you life anyways.
There is no reason to go test driving anyways..
Learn how to get along with a person without it first. That way the "drive" isnt all you have in the relationship.


----------



## Spotlite

olchevy said:


> However now it brings up another question...........
> 
> Would it be wrong at all if I was to marry a girl that had not waited....even if she had changed and was on the right path, would that be ok?
> 
> Or would I be setting myself up for martial problems later down the road?



When you find out if its wrong or not, let me know please. I didnt wait. Wished I did but I didnt, high school years got to me. However, my wife did wait. That was a hard adjustment for me, but I respected her wishes. It was well worth the wait and built a strong bond between us. I have the utmost respect for her today for that.

We have not had any issues over my not waiting, its a bridge I burned when I met her and never tried to cross again. Somehow, the right person just knows how to leave it in the past and not throw it up at you.  As far as both of us are concerned, what I did in immaturity, never even happened.


----------



## olchevy

SarahFair said:


> Its nice to hear of a guy who waits. It shows he has morals and values. If a girl _really_ knows what she is looking for she will love you and wont take it as a challenge. That kind of girl is will want to do nothing but tear you down for the rest of you life anyways.
> There is no reason to go test driving anyways..
> Learn how to get along with a person without it first. That way the "drive" isnt all you have in the relationship.



Thanks, Actually I have been meaning to ask you for a while now who that is in your avatar? Usually when someone puts up a picture of a model or actress I know who they are or have at least seen them before, but your avatar has been throwing me for a loop for a while now, cause I can not figure out who she is....Who is she?


----------



## SarahFair

olchevy said:


> Thanks, Actually I have been meaning to ask you for a while now who that is in your avatar? Usually when someone puts up a picture of a model or actress I know who they are or have at least seen them before, but your avatar has been throwing me for a loop for a while now, cause I can not figure out who she is....Who is she?



haha, Model... 
She _is_ me.
And thank you. Comments like that can make a lady blush


----------



## olchevy

Well at least I finally know who she is, You are very beautiful.


----------



## SarahFair

Thank you very much!


----------



## mikel

olchevy said:


> Well at least I finally know who she is, You are very beautiful.


 easy big fella


----------



## olchevy

mikel said:


> easy big fella



Hey, the truth is the truth....I can't do anything about that.


----------



## Pilgrim

Dude, wait.
Come on, it's not rocket science.  Wait.
It's VERY DIFFICULT to find ONE thing that almost all of the major religions in the world agree on - and this is one of them!
I'm 37, single, and I'm a virgin.  Big deal!  I don't need any pats on the back.  In my heart I'm a rapist and a really big screw-up, .... so are you!  The very fact that Jesus came to earth makes that super clear.  This life is only a vapor.  
I can promise you that I am no less of a man for not having yet experienced sex.  Do I want that experience?  HECK YEAH!!!!  But the battle must be faced daily.  If you would've told me when I was 18 that 20yrs later I would still be a virgin, I would have been looking for the nearest revolver!  Why?  B/c my thinking was completely dominated by my culture which told me: "If you're not having sex, you are not experiencing a fully human life."  That's such a freaking lie.  Our culture says sex is a performance.  It's not.  It's simply a physical picture of what happens when a couple becomes 'naked' in every other part of their rel'ship (i.e., finances, strengths, weaknesses, thoughts on family, etc).  That's right, the physical is just an expression of having become SO committed to this person that you are ready to say, "I am completely and utterly yours - and no one else's."  In that sense, sex is similar to the Lord's supper.
Your body is not your own, and it is not designed for sexual immorality.  It is designed for the Lord (these are not my thoughts btw, 1Corinthians6).
You'll gain a lot of relief when you believe that it is for YOUR GOOD that you wait.  Believe the Scripture.  And when you don't, ask for help.  Be like the guy in Mark who said, "Lord, I believe.  Help my unbelief."  I pray that every day!, and guess what..... His grace is sufficient.  
This life is NOT all there is; don't live like it is..... unless, of course you're an atheist.  In that case, why would you not have sex with as many girls as possible?


----------



## humdandy

If she has or her parents have money ..............wait!

If she lives in a trailer park.......find another one.


----------

