# What do you tell a teen that wants to quit football when he has potential??



## Shadow11 (May 15, 2022)

I'm kind of befunkled here. Advice needed because I don't know what else to do or say to this kid. I'm worried to say the least.


My nephew, sophomore in highschool, has always had this dream of playing football at uga. He has worked his b-hind off.


He's lifting more weight than anyone his size. He's faster than anyone else. He has amazing hands and agility.  He was one of four guys that lettered as a freshman...​

...Now, he has decided he wants to completely quit. He's already turned in his equipment. I think the coach will let him come back if he's willing.


I don't know what to tell him. He won't talk about it to me. I know he has issues with a black dude that beat up his friend last year, and he's competing for the same position, but I still don't really know what's going on. His parents have problems too, which might be a part of it as well. Drugs might be involved, or maybe he decided to be queer. No idea.


This is his most important yr of his life if he still wants football, which I'm sure he does.


What can I tell him so that he won't regret it later?


Advice please.


Thanks!


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## 4HAND (May 15, 2022)

Seems to me you're gonna need to know what the problem is or what has caused him to quit before you can give him sound advice.


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## jrickman (May 15, 2022)

In these situations I'm always inclined to ask if the kid was really enjoying playing or if he was playing out of a sense of obligation. A lot of families pressure kids in sports without even realizing they are.


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## DOUG 281 (May 15, 2022)

You can keep trying to talk with him but i would not get to hard on him but maybe you can get him out take him fishing or something and talk to him he may open up and tell you what's going on. Best of luck my friend


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## Jester896 (May 15, 2022)

something big turned him away..no doubt...I'd wait until he was ready to tell you what did.  they aren't your choices and you should support him

i am going through something similar with one of my grands...he pitched JV as a freshman...he is JV now pitching Varsity....ready to throw in playing for school...still plays travel ball...my job is to support him and his decisions


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## antharper (May 15, 2022)

I would do as Doug 281 said . Take him fishing , maybe a camping trip . Maybe a fishing/ camping trip in the mountains ?


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## NE GA Pappy (May 16, 2022)

unless he or his parents have asked you to be involved in the situation, keep your nose out of it.


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## Shadow11 (May 16, 2022)

antharper said:


> I would do as Doug 281 said . Take him fishing , maybe a camping trip . Maybe a fishing/ camping trip in the mountains ?



That's exactly what i tried yesterday. Everything was good to go Saturday night, but he didn't show up Sunday morning. Said his allergies were messed up. I just don't get it.

His entire life that's been his passion and dream. All of the sudden he wants to quit. The coach told my brother he will definitely be good enough for college. He said in his 20 plus years that he's never seen anyone that talented quit. My nephew said his hamstring is sore. The coach said that's fine, and he could just sit out, but still could hang around, learn the plays, stay on the team, etc.

My nephew said he might come back and play his senior year, but the coach said he won't get any playing time if he does that.

I know from experience that he'll regret it later in life. It's not a "family putting pressure on him" type of tthin like someone said. He had this dream for years, and he's giving up on it at the most important time.


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## transfixer (May 16, 2022)

Jester896 said:


> something big turned him away..no doubt...I'd wait until he was ready to tell you what did.  they aren't your choices and you should support him
> 
> i am going through something similar with one of my grands...he pitched JV as a freshman...he is JV now pitching Varsity....ready to throw in playing for school...still plays travel ball...my job is to support him and his decisions



    I whole heartedly agree with this ^^

   unless he is willing to talk to you about why he wants to quit,,  then all you can do is support his decision and be there for him if he wants to talk,  teens that age will usually talk to someone who isn't putting pressure on them,  before they will someone who is , 

    Don't hound him about quitting,  if he's making a mistake ?  its his to make,  if he's willing to talk about why he's quitting , and its something you can help him figure out ? then that's great !   otherwise ,   just back off and let him know you're there for him if he needs you .


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## treemanjohn (May 16, 2022)

Children do things to please their parents. Sounds like he's ready to do things for himself.


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## benellisbe (May 16, 2022)

I had a couple of buddies in high school that quit baseball. One was very talented and would likely have played D1 baseball.  After a lot of years of travel ball, coaching sessions (hitting, pitching, etc.) I think they were just burned out with all of it.  I try not to pressure my kids, but have always told them if you sign up you will finish the season.

Its a tough position to be in, for you, but I would give him space and let him open up to you.  If you pester him, he will just push further away.  Teens have so much to deal with between dating, rigors of high school, etc. I personally think Social Media is one of the worst things to let anyone under 21 utilize. There are so many different avenues and the keyboard tough guys would have made my school far worse when I was in high school. My 7th grader has friends with phones and social media accounts, the drama associated with social media is just insane. Social media, along with a general lack of knowledge amongst many adults, make it very difficult to monitor what is going on.  I work in the IT industry and I can barely keep up with all the different platforms being utilized.


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## JustUs4All (May 16, 2022)

If he is unwilling to share the problems with you, there is nothing you can tell him that will help anything.


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## elfiii (May 16, 2022)

I'll give you the same advice my grandfather gave my parents which they promptly ignored - the harder you push him, the more he will resist.

There are reasons he doesn't want to play anymore and he's not willing to share those reasons for whatever reason. Just be a good uncle. Shut up about it, be quiet and wait to see if he wants to talk to you about it.


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## brownceluse (May 16, 2022)

A couple things as several have already said. The pressure on him is intense and he’s still a kid no matter how much weight he’s lifting. Parents and other family tend to live the dream through these child athletes. My nephew was an outstanding baseball player and student. He was asked to skip grades etc. He was in every gifted program under the sun in school. Senior year he quit all sports! My brother was crushed! Travel ball his whole life! Everything! He flunked out of college his 2nd semester. Two years later he’s in the Army and thriving! That’s all he ever wanted was to be a soldier. My brother wanted him to be a baseball player! My son skipped his junior year of HS football. The coach called me and told me he didn’t have to practice and would play in the games he needed him that bad. Long story short I didn’t allow that. He played his senior year and was the starting center! No regrets. The pressure that family puts on these woods is ridiculous! Let the kid take a breath. I didn’t even force my kids to go to college! Both of my kids are doing great in the real world. If and when they do decide to further their education I’ll pay for it. Maybe then they’ll have a clear direction on what they really want to do instead of a worthless degree in a field they don’t work in. Then to only have a job that pays equal to what the guy beside them is making with a defray deal and a bunch of debt!


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## mallardsx2 (May 16, 2022)

I quit baseball cause it cut into my turkey hunting.

I didn’t have much potential in baseball anyhow because all of the coaches and assistant coaches kids got to play wherever they wanted , whenever they wanted. Lol


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## specialk (May 16, 2022)

elfiii said:


> I'll give you the same advice my grandfather gave my parents which they promptly ignored - the harder you push him, the more he will resist.
> 
> There are reasons he doesn't want to play anymore and he's not willing to share those reasons for whatever reason. Just be a good uncle. Shut up about it, be quiet and wait to see if he wants to talk to you about it.




this, find out what his ''new'' interests are and encourage them.....


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## KS Bow Hunter (May 16, 2022)

Well this is a hard one.  I have a niece who played all the way up to college and had softball scholarships to D1 schools like LSU and threw in the towel...it was her call...she wanted something different...

For him, he needs to find someone he believes in and trusts, and that can talk to him...

Watch "Remember the Titans" or "All American" with him...

You never get another chance to do it in high school...

I could have played in college, but really got off track my senior year and screwed up both baseball and football...


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## Flash (May 16, 2022)

If you do talk, ask him to try and look forward to when he's 40/50 'what do you want to see when you look back'     That should help him decide either way


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## Russdaddy (May 16, 2022)

You lost me at "Black Dude" and Decided to be queer....Was the other athletes skin color important to the situation. Pretty big jump from if no football then maybe queer. I am no fan of the WOKE culture but no reason to give them any ammo. 
If this type of tone is used when talking FB to him it might be why he shuts you down.


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## ryanh487 (May 16, 2022)

Something happened. Don't rule out sexual abuse or other highly sensitive and embarrassing situations that may have arisen in the environment,  no matter how big and strong he is.  The power environment of coaches/ trainers/etc puts them at an upper hand to psychologically groom and manipulate their victims.  If you make derogatory comments about gays and he feels like he's been violated and is afraid of being accused of being gay, you're the last person he's going to talk to about it.  If you can't be genuinely supportive and understanding to ANY and ALL reasons that may be impacting this situation then keep your mouth shut or you'll just make it worse.


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## jrickman (May 16, 2022)

Man, this is going off the rails. The kid may just not like playing football anymore.


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## mizzippi jb (May 16, 2022)

jrickman said:


> Man, this is going off the rails. The kid may just not like playing football anymore.


Yeah the more I read the more I agree with you. Started off with good advice..... Went all "Oprah" later.


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## Pig Predator (May 16, 2022)

mallardsx2 said:


> I quit baseball cause it cut into my turkey hunting.
> 
> I didn’t have much potential in baseball anyhow because all of the coaches and assistant coaches kids got to play wherever they wanted , whenever they wanted. Lol


This thread isn't about you sucking at baseball. But, I'm hopeful your a better turkey hunter for it...


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## jbird1 (May 16, 2022)

The burnout factor is real...If they want out, so be it.  There's way more to life.


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## Hillbilly stalker (May 16, 2022)

Its gonna take a person he really trusts....or a complete stranger for him to open up to. More pressure is never the answer. All kinds of things going on with a boy that age. Might be over a girl. If its just because he is tired of it, I would think he would be more forth coming about it.


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## trad bow (May 16, 2022)

I think he needs a long float in a kayak on a cool slow moving river catching fish if he so desires and chilling out away from all the pressure of people trying to tell him how to live his life.


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## bullgator (May 16, 2022)

Maybe it’s something as simple as a girlfriend.

I would find out if he still likes the game. If he does, whatever caused him to want to quit will eventually surface. At that point I’d let him know that quitting is never the answer to your problems.


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## trad bow (May 16, 2022)

I believe in fulfilling one’s obligations. But sometimes as a person grows and their thought process changes, their outlook on life changes. It’s up to them to decide. I myself wouldn’t want my son or daughter participating if they didn’t want to be out there. If you’re not completely focused then that’s when a life changing injury can occur.


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## Railroader (May 16, 2022)

Football don't mean nothing, that boy's well being does.

And his well being is where the focus should be placed.

That's all.


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## ryanh487 (May 16, 2022)

Just to clarify I didn't mean something serious was likely the cause,  I simply meant it shouldn't be assumed not to be and encouraged delicacy in approaching the issue if you approach it at all.


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## mallardsx2 (May 16, 2022)

Pig Predator said:


> This thread isn't about you sucking at baseball. But, I'm hopeful your a better turkey hunter for it...



This thread isn’t about you trying to insult me either Pig. Not that I really care..

I was trying to say in a nice way that maybe he wasn’t getting much playing time so he figured it was time to move on.


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## Madsnooker (May 17, 2022)

I went thru this with my oldest son. Played AAU basketball ball for years and was really good. He was good enough to play college ball but one day after practice his senior year on the way home he says Dad, I'm not going to college. I'm also done with Basketball. Needless to say I was crushed, upset, mad, confused????? Thankfully I only responded with, we will talk about it tonight. After I dropped him off at home I left to get my thoughts together as well as call a couple of people I had great respect for for additional advice. That night I told my son that I was proud of him and I would support him no mater what he decided. I know that was not what he expected me to say that night 7 years ago but I could tell a mountain was lifted from him that night. He never looked back. He graduated hs and within 3 years started his own site work business and is doing better then I could have ever imagined for him.

My advice, and that's all it is, let go of the idea that football is his path to success becuaes in reality that's only true for 1% of anyone that ever strapped a helmet on. Instead love on him as his Uncle and tell him you are proud of the football player he was but now your excited to see what the next chapter in his life holds. That reaction will do way more for your relationship with him then trying to fix the situation in your eyes. It also might allow him to reveal what's really going on as well?


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## dusty200001 (May 17, 2022)

Yeah I have some advice on this issue. I was that guy, that busted my tail. Was stronger, faster , smart and at one point loved the game.  However the coaches were trash. It was a unfair system that rewarded certain types of individuals that were not the best players. I went all the way through and hated it, looking back inside I would have quit, I could have done way more fun and productive things than hating practice. Not to mention if your head ain’t in it injuries will more likely come and now being older those injuries show


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## huntersluck (May 17, 2022)

I am in no way trying to be rude here but it’s his business not yours,   Let him decide for himself    The one thing his parents definitely don’t need to do is push him into it he will hate it even more


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## Cool Hand Luke (May 17, 2022)

At 5'10" and 165 lbs as a senior, never had a chance to play college ball but would knock your head off. Now at 57 my old bones can feel every hit. Wish I had never played the sport. Maybe he has wisdom beyond his years?


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## Sixes (May 17, 2022)

Sounds like all the adults around him are trying to live life through him. I doubt that he has always dreamed of playing football at Ga, sounds to me like everyone around him wants him to play football at Georgia.

Forcing him to play will only make it worse.

Let him make his own choices and you have no idea if he will regret quitting or not, he could look back in 20 years and think it was the smartest move he made.

Playing high school sports is a tiny fraction of a person's life


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## BeerThirty (May 17, 2022)

Lots of advice here to back off, give him space and let him make his own mistakes. But I was in that kid's shoes....

I was a quality athlete in HS, with dreams of perhaps playing college ball one day. I was getting recruitment letters from all kinds of D3, D2 and even some bottom tier D1 schools. 6'4, 315 lbs, benching 350, squatting 550, playing both sides of the ball, etc... At the same time, I also accepted that I was going to college to get an education and I wanted to give my all to my studies. I didn't think I had it in me focus on school, work a part-time job AND put in the daily physical work as part of the football training. So ultimately, I gave up on football. And, to this day, it's the biggest regret of my life. I wish I had someone talk some sense into me. Everyone gave me space and no one even tried. It's one of the most important lessons I've learned in my life by having to feel that regret, because I haven't moved on even after 20 years...


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## formula1 (May 17, 2022)

Three sons myself! They have to live their life and they have to find their own path. Encourage them and build them up whenever possible no matter their choices. Correct them only when their path heads down a dark road. That is all!


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## GTMODawg (May 17, 2022)

In general terms playing high school varsity football in Georgia is something that has to be a burning desire to be done well and safely.  If a players heart ain't in it no more there is not a lot that anyone can do....it is really hard work and the only real reward for the agonies of two a days and summers spent in the weight room is the satisfaction it gives the individual.  All of the praise and glory that derives from external forces is meaningless when you are exhausted and you still gotta give all you got.  Not having a consuminig passion for the game is a good way to get hurt at the level the game is played in Georgia high schools....there are a bunch of DIV 1 bodies on football fields in Georgia on Friday nights and if a kid has the talent but has lost the drive he has no business on those fields.  The drive can protect a kid with little talent and ability but all of the talent in the world is meaningless without the desire to do the work.  There is no shame in it....it is really really hard work, you gotta be just about insane to put yourself through it when everyone you know is having fun and you are in the gym all day every day when you have any free time at all.  Talent and ability is only a small part of the equation.....and it ain't heart....heart is important also but you got to love knocking the slobber out of someone and getting the slobber knocked out of you while a maniac named coach calls you everything but a child of god and you got to beg for more of all of that to do it right.  That desire can erode quickly and there ain't no shame in it....it is hard enough to realize you just don't enjoy it any longer without outside forces trying to live vicariously through you.


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## GTMODawg (May 17, 2022)

I played high school football from age 7 to my senior year in high school and from the 6th to 8th grade I played on a youth team, a youth traveling team and on a varsity high school team at the same time.   Practiced 4 days a week, played a game and practiced on Thursdays and then games on Friday (I didn't play much LOL) and another one on Saturdays, often traveling 3 hours to do so.  I played varsity football and started 4 years when I made it to the 9th grade.  I had some div 3 offers so I had some talent and even took a recruiting trip to Clem's son but only because they were interested in a team mate and asked me to make the trip also...there was no chance I was going to get an offer but it was still fun.  I was ATE up with playing football....I loved it and could not get enough of it.  I even liked 2 a days and spending every spare minute in the weight room.  When it wasn't football season, which is not much of the year in Georgia, I was playing sand lot football every day.  It is just about all I did from from age 7 to I graduated high school.  You got to be just about insane to do that to your body.  I enjoyed it but I do not regret giving it up after graduation and in fact wish I had gotten in the band in school because I could still be playing an instrument but football is strictly a spectator sport for me LOL.   If a kid does not have that kind of passion for the game it is way to easy to get completely burnt out.....it is a lot of work and it is hard on the body, even at 16.  You gotta be comsumed by the desire to compete in football to put up with the amount of work involved to do it at the varsity level in Georgia and do it well.....


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## OwlRNothing (May 17, 2022)

Russdaddy said:


> You lost me at "Black Dude" and Decided to be queer....Was the other athletes skin color important to the situation. Pretty big jump from if no football then maybe queer. I am no fan of the WOKE culture but no reason to give them any ammo.
> If this type of tone is used when talking FB to him it might be why he shuts you down.


I kinda find your reaction to what he said to be more of an "ammo they can use" kinda thing, actually. Maybe the other kids did find out he was gay and put pressure on him so he quit? Maybe he decided he didn't like running anymore? Maybe he decided he was Buddhist and non-violence was his new life now? The guy didn't say "here's an exhaustive list of possibilities." Plus, he might have decided he was queer. So, there's that. 

lolz?


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## huntersluck (May 17, 2022)

mallardsx2 said:


> I quit baseball cause it cut into my turkey hunting.
> 
> I didn’t have much potential in baseball anyhow because all of the coaches and assistant coaches kids got to play wherever they wanted , whenever they wanted. Lol




Hunting an fishing time comes before baseball , football or any other team  sport you made the correct choice.


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## MudDucker (May 18, 2022)

I played the game, got hurt, had a choice of surgery or quit and I quit.  These days with all these kids go through, they have to have a burning desire in their own guts to keep going and push through.

Saying that, he might just be having a phase as we all did as teenagers.  Best to tell him you support him in whatever he choses and let him work through it.  If you force him and his heart isn't in it, he is liable to get hurt and that would be on you.


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## turkeykirk (May 18, 2022)

You have to play for the love of the sport. If you don’t love it it just becomes drudgery and a job. I lived and slept basketball for years. Loved it. Got a scholarship to college. After my first year I realized that the love wasn’t there anymore. Should have quit and done something else.


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## BeerThirty (May 18, 2022)

A lot of advice on here that if kids don't have their hearts in it that they should move on. But to what? To get stuck in some boring job 5, 10, 15 years down the road and regret not pushing through? The problem is that many kids don't have the perspective to realize their own talent and the opportunities that are literally right in front of them. I bet most of you guys on here who played high school, or even college football would agree that it was some of the best years of your life. And yes, I'm playing devil's advocate on purpose here...


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## jbogg (May 18, 2022)

I’m a year away from turning 60, and if I had known how my old football injuries would come back with such a vengeance I would have never played.  My son was a starter for a D1 program, but after 2 years  of year round football and mandatory summer school he was burned out.  On the inside my wife and I were selfishly disappointed since we enjoyed traveling to see him play, and the whole game day experience.  On the outside we fully supported his decision since I had been down that road myself, and understood the commitment required.

After turning in his cleats he used his newly found free time to take flying lessons.  Five years later he is a commercial pilot with a Regional Carrier, and has never looked back. Support your nephew.  When one door closes, another one opens.


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## BamaGeorgialine (May 18, 2022)

I'm amazed at all the lost potential D-1 athletes on this forum. It's like a 10th grade Hall of Fame! Rally good athletes and D-1 athletes aren't around every corner, or forum for that matter. I graduated with two. One of my buddies got drafted to pitch for the Texas Rangers in the 7th round. The other was a tight end at Tennessee with Peyton Manning. Both of these guys were 6'6 and just born differently. My son played basketball and could shoot the lights out. He's 6'3 and probably could have played at a D-2 school. Division one athletes are freaks of nature. He played with Emory Jones. Emory was that. He was just different. My son made varsity as a 9th grader and decided to quit when he was in 11th grade. Reality set in after he played against Jalen Brown and Colin Sexton who both play in the NBA. I'd tell the kid good decision and now let's figure out what's next


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## ryanh487 (May 18, 2022)

huntersluck said:


> Hunting an fishing time comes before baseball , football or any other team  sport you made the correct choice.




That's why i quit baseball in middle school.  started scheduling games and practices in the fall on weekend mornings.  I was young but i was the kid coaches fought over in my league.  When I made contact with the ball i crushed it and could throw far and accurately. But once i had to decide between a 9:00 AM mandatory practice before an 11:00 AM game every saturday and sitting in a deer stand, i quit the team faster than you can say "OUT".  Of course my dad is also the primary reason i had been playing and he was no longer active on the team at that point either, i much preferred to hunt with him than sit in a dugout after mom dropped me off while he was hunting without me.


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

BamaGeorgialine said:


> Division one athletes are freaks of nature.



Most folks don't know that and have no concept of the difference between a D1 athlete and a really good high school player.......it's like a man on a field with boys.  



BamaGeorgialine said:


> He played with Emory Jones. Emory was that. He was just different.



WE must be from the same area.  I run into a lotta folks who played with Jones, and they all say the same thing.


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## BeerThirty (May 18, 2022)

JB0704 said:


> Most folks don't know that and have no concept of the difference between a D1 athlete and a really good high school player.......it's like a man on a field with boys.


Yes and no. For example, lineman… Colleges will look at lineman that have the size but maybe don’t necessarily have the speed or skill. Some colleges will look at potential.


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

BeerThirty said:


> Yes and no. For example, lineman… Colleges will look at lineman that have the size but maybe don’t necessarily have the speed or skill. Some colleges will look at potential.



I knew when my kid was 6 that he wouldn't ever get anywhere close to a college team.  I think it made all those years more enjoyable for me watching him play three sports all the way through HS because it was for love of the game.  A lot of kids have parents who can't see things for whut they are.  Billy ain't less a person because he wasn't born with speed, size, or talent......he's just not a D1 athlete.  There are other things in life one can be.


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## treemanjohn (May 18, 2022)

BamaGeorgialine said:


> I'm amazed at all the lost potential D-1 athletes on this forum. It's like a 10th grade Hall of Fame! Rally good athletes and D-1 athletes aren't around every corner, or forum for that matter. I graduated with two. One of my buddies got drafted to pitch for the Texas Rangers in the 7th round. The other was a tight end at Tennessee with Peyton Manning. Both of these guys were 6'6 and just born differently. My son played basketball and could shoot the lights out. He's 6'3 and probably could have played at a D-2 school. Division one athletes are freaks of nature. He played with Emory Jones. Emory was that. He was just different. My son made varsity as a 9th grader and decided to quit when he was in 11th grade. Reality set in after he played against Jalen Brown and Colin Sexton who both play in the NBA. I'd tell the kid good decision and now let's figure out what's next


Folks just don't understand the differences that each level brings. I played and coached baseball at a very high level. Far above most college level athletes. Only a couple were true ball players. Everyone else was a dreamer. 

I'll never forget when Raphael Belliard fron the Braves came to work out with us for a few days. Weeks prior every guy on the team swore they were better if given a chance. "Can't hit water falling out of a boat" " tiny mouse of a man" "slow on the base path".....  I just giggled every time. 

Within an hour every guy on that field understood why he was a long time MLB veteran.  Not another word was said.


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## AceOfTheBase (May 18, 2022)

Statistic of one here, after 10 days into 2 week pre-season training, twice a day killer workouts, ending with 2 mile runs in uniforms, I decided enough was enough and walked off. 
The head coach found me and had a very simple chat -  he said: " I know you can do it, but you'll never know if you stop now".  Talked with my folks about it and went on to do two successful seasons playing right offensive guard and defensive end.  We did both O/D back then. We were undefeated in our conference those two years.


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## The Original Rooster (May 18, 2022)

treemanjohn said:


> Folks just don't understand the differences that each level brings. I played and coached baseball at a very high level. Far above most college level athletes. Only a couple were true ball players. Everyone else was a dreamer.
> 
> I'll never forget when Raphael Belliard fron the Braves came to work out with us for a few days. Weeks prior every guy on the team swore they were better if given a chance. "Can't hit water falling out of a boat" " tiny mouse of a man" "slow on the base path".....  I just giggled every time.
> 
> Within an hour every guy on that field understood why he was a long time MLB veteran.  Not another word was said.


My dad explained that to me back in the 80's about the Braves when I was complaining about how bad they were. He had played some A and AA ball in the late 50's and early 60's and he told me that everyone needed to understand how refined all the players were at that level. Those players on the field were the best of the best in high school, college, A, AA, and AAA ball and even then had to beat out other major league players just to get on the field.


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## JustUs4All (May 18, 2022)

Since this has degerated into a horn blowing contest - 

Man, I could'a been really good if only I'd had enough speed to get out of my own way. I gave up on the ball sports before High School and let my brother do it.  He played baseball and basketball and still talks trash about how good he was.  Whenever he starts I tell him to come get a pistol, rifle, shotgun, or rod and reel and we will see who is any good at anything now the we have matured some.


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## Hunter922 (May 18, 2022)

His decision, support him. Even if he goes back if he doesn't absolutely 100% want to do it, he will step away..


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## jrickman (May 18, 2022)

treemanjohn said:


> Folks just don't understand the differences that each level brings. I played and coached baseball at a very high level. Far above most college level athletes. Only a couple were true ball players. Everyone else was a dreamer.



I've played a few games of backyard football with 2 former NFL cornerbacks (one in the HoF). You cannot imagine the level of athleticism these guys possess until you have experienced it first hand. The differences may seem minor on paper, but in the real world it is dramatic.


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## BamaGeorgialine (May 18, 2022)

My son and I were out in PTC last Monday buying some shoes and Will Smith, the Braves Will Smith, came in the store. The dude is a very large dude. And yoked at that


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## treemanjohn (May 18, 2022)

jrickman said:


> I've played a few games of backyard football with 2 former NFL cornerbacks (one in the HoF). You cannot imagine the level of athleticism these guys possess until you have experienced it first hand. The differences may seem minor on paper, but in the real world it is dramatic.


I had Carl Pickens, UT and NFL receiver fill in the outfield for my team a few times  He's other worldly. 

Most D1 and pro athletes played 2 or 3 other sports just as well. They just chose a single path


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## Railroader (May 18, 2022)

JustUs4All said:


> Since this has degerated into a horn blowing contest -
> 
> Man, I could'a been really good if only I'd had enough speed to get out of my own way. I gave up on the ball sports before High School and let my brother do it.  He played baseball and basketball and still talks trash about how good he was.  Whenever he starts I tell him to come get a pistol, rifle, shotgun, or rod and reel and we will see who is any good at anything now the we have matured some.



I find it very sad when I run up on a grown man who has to talk trash about how good he was at sports when he was in high school...

Usually the 30 or 40-something, beer gutted, jersey wearing, superfan that can't take his kid hunting, fishing, or anything else because there is a game coming on the TV.  He's tired from sitting at his desk all week, and just wants to relax...

I was lucky.  My Dad taught a neighborhood full of boys how to shoot, hunt, fish, swim, drive a tractor, and a dozen other things...

Sure, we'd watch a ballgame once in a moon, but only if it was storming out or there was nothing else that needed doing.

Pop always said to make sure and make life interesting enough to "be your own hero"...

I only lettered in three sports growing up.

Woods.
Water.
Work.

For 98% of folks who play organized sports, there is no point in it, other than fun.  It'll be OVER with high school.  And all that time spent will have gained them nothing that they will ever use again.

But the 2% of elite athletes absolutely depend on the 98%, or they are nothing, either.

There's way too much money, politics, and emphasis placed on ball sports so that 2% of "real players" get a chance to make it big one day, on the shoulders of regular kids.

Forgive the rant, but that's how I see it, and the reason that ball sports never mattered to me, and never will.

There's just too many things to do that matter, to waste time on things that don't...

I remain hopeful that the boy in the original post gets the help and support he needs.


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

Railroader said:


> For 98% of folks who play organized sports, there is no point in it, other than fun.  It'll be OVER with high school.  And all that time spent will have gained them nothing that they will ever use again..



I agree with the overall idea of your rant.......but.......I think about my son's experience with sports.  He grew up in the suburbs (didn't move out to the country until he was off to college).  So, there was no tractors to drive.  No woods to run around and kill / trap / find mischief in.  Sports were his outlet to keep him away from video games and online nonsense so many kids get into these days.  It taught him hard work and perseverance, how to give 110% to everything he did.  How to be dependable (never missed a practice, always went to the "extra" practices).  How to be a team player.  How to achieve in spite of obstacles.  There are so many intangibles associated with sports that folks miss when they think lil Billy is GON get a full ride to UGA.  In one way, I am lucky that we always knew that wasn't happening so we could focus on squeezing the intangibles out of every sport he played.  Just saying if you approach it correctly, sports have a lot of value for a young'n.

And, he also has killed a few deer and caught a few fish along the way.


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## Railroader (May 18, 2022)

JB0704 said:


> I agree with the overall idea of your rant.......but.......I think about my son's experience with sports.  He grew up in the suburbs (didn't move out to the country until he was off to college).  So, there was no tractors to drive.  No woods to run around and kill / trap / find mischief in.  Sports were his outlet to keep him away from video games and online nonsense so many kids get into these days.  It taught him hard work and perseverance, how to give 110% to everything he did.  How to be dependable (never missed a practice, always went to the "extra" practices).  How to be a team player.  How to achieve in spite of obstacles.  There are so many intangibles associated with sports that folks miss when they think lil Billy is GON get a full ride to UGA.  In one way, I am lucky that we always knew that wasn't happening so we could focus on squeezing the intangibles out of every sport he played.  Just saying if you approach it correctly, sports have a lot of value for a young'n.
> 
> And, he also has killed a few deer and caught a few fish along the way.



Then I would say that y'all did it right, JB, and squeezed all y'all could out of it.  And that's not a bad thing.

And if he'd said "Dad, I am sick of football, I want to learn to work on cars"...

Y'all would have bought a jalopy, and squeezed it all outta that, too.

With no worries about his lost opportunity, or giving up "his" dream...

But I am just guessing....


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

Railroader said:


> Then I would say that y'all did it right, JB, and squeezed all y'all could out of it.  And that's not a bad thing.
> 
> And if he'd said "Dad, I am sick of football, I want to learn to work on cars"...
> 
> ...



Yup.  It was never about me.  Only about him learning intangibles.  Primarily hard work.  BTW.....he n I did restore an old Bronco together.........which subsequently broke down on him 50% of the time while he was in college, lol.  But, when his truck wasn't working (seriously half the time) the kid walked to work at 530 in the morning a few days a week and on weekends (intangibles again).


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

All three my daughters are also playing multiple sports too, for the same reasons.......even though we also have them working out in the garden, and the field, and the 13 yr old is learning how to drive a tractor.  I'm for anything that will teach a kid lessons on hard work and a sense of accomplishment.  They play sports I know nothing about, volleyball, soccer, and basketball, so it's def not me trying to live through them.  None of them will ever make a college team.  I just think there is value there to be had when approached the right way.  

Again, the point is very accurate relevant to parents forcing their dreams on kids.  IT is also accurate that most lil Billy's ain't never GON go near as far in sports as their parents think they will.


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## Johnny 71 (May 18, 2022)

NE GA Pappy said:


> unless he or his parents have asked you to be involved in the situation, keep your nose out of it.


Best advice ^


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## mguthrie (May 18, 2022)

JB0704 said:


> I agree with the overall idea of your rant.......but.......I think about my son's experience with sports.  He grew up in the suburbs (didn't move out to the country until he was off to college).  So, there was no tractors to drive.  No woods to run around and kill / trap / find mischief in.  Sports were his outlet to keep him away from video games and online nonsense so many kids get into these days.  It taught him hard work and perseverance, how to give 110% to everything he did.  How to be dependable (never missed a practice, always went to the "extra" practices).  How to be a team player.  How to achieve in spite of obstacles.  There are so many intangibles associated with sports that folks miss when they think lil Billy is GON get a full ride to UGA.  In one way, I am lucky that we always knew that wasn't happening so we could focus on squeezing the intangibles out of every sport he played.  Just saying if you approach it correctly, sports have a lot of value for a young'n.
> 
> And, he also has killed a few deer and caught a few fish along the way.


You did a fine job with buzz JB. He’s grow up to be a good young man. I’m sure sports taught him a lot more than how to play a game.


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## JB0704 (May 18, 2022)

mguthrie said:


> You did a fine job with buzz JB. He’s grow up to be a good young man. I’m sure sports taught him a lot more than how to play a game.



Thanks Guth!  Much appreciated.  I’m very proud of that kid.


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## DannyW (May 19, 2022)

JB0704 said:


> I agree with the overall idea of your rant.......but.......I think about my son's experience with sports.  He grew up in the suburbs (didn't move out to the country until he was off to college).  So, there was no tractors to drive.  No woods to run around and kill / trap / find mischief in.  Sports were his outlet to keep him away from video games and online nonsense so many kids get into these days.  It taught him hard work and perseverance, how to give 110% to everything he did.  How to be dependable (never missed a practice, always went to the "extra" practices).  How to be a team player.  How to achieve in spite of obstacles.  There are so many intangibles associated with sports that folks miss when they think lil Billy is GON get a full ride to UGA.  In one way, I am lucky that we always knew that wasn't happening so we could focus on squeezing the intangibles out of every sport he played.  Just saying if you approach it correctly, sports have a lot of value for a young'n.
> 
> And, he also has killed a few deer and caught a few fish along the way.



This could be me talking about my boy. He played football, and was blessed with technique but lacked size and speed. The coaches always used him as an example in technique to the other players...but...he was the backup to Orlando Brown (drafted by Baltimore and now with KC). So we both knew he was never getting any meaningful playing time.

We had a discussion once and he told me what he really liked was being part of a team, especially the required discipline and hard work. Even though his part was being a live blocking dummy for Orlando. 

My advice to the OP is to be there if he needs to talk about it but stay in your lane and not try to be a parent.


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## ATLFalconsfan80 (May 19, 2022)

Its every kids dream when they play sports to play pro or at least play for their favorite college team. Then they grow older and they see other kids matching their level and eventually passing them and then a realization sets in with them whether it be a good one or bad one.

 The OP didn't specify the kid height, weight or position. I'm assuming, and I could be totally wrong, WR or RB due to the agility footwork and hands comment also with a kid whos he's obviously competing with. If he's not up to the challenge to compete for a position then HS sports is where it ends. Its easy to be the big fish in a small pond but can he be the bigger fish in a bigger pond, and unfortunately he doesn't seem to have that mindset he needs to play D1 football especially SEC. 

No jabs towards that kid or his family, I wish him the best in his hopefully bright future.

One last question, the kid whos he's supposedly competing against, is he a grade higher than your nephew? If so that would explain why he said he would wait till his senior year to play and that would show he's scared of competition and then it becomes that its something in him he needs to focus on now...confidence


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## MudDucker (May 19, 2022)

My only dream was to play for Valdosta High Wildcats.


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## ATLFalconsfan80 (May 19, 2022)

MudDucker said:


> My only dream was to play for Valdosta High Wildcats.



I don’t blame you with that program….


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## Pig Predator (May 19, 2022)

I dont know about yall but when I was a sophomore in high school I was kinda wanting to be in the position of one of em boy cheerleaders during the game....but I couldn't handle all the spot light... wasnt pretty enough eyereckon....


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## gobbleinwoods (May 19, 2022)

My only comment to the young man would be if you change your mind later it will be hard to beat out your replacement unless you are that much better.


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## across the river (May 19, 2022)

The hard reality is that unless you can pull his name up now as a sophomore on the recruiting sites and he is not only list but has a bunch of stars by his name, he ain’t going to Georgia, at least on a football scholarship. If the kid doesn’t want to do it, there is no point in pushing him to do it.  If you want to push anything, push him on his grades.  That will matter in 30 years.  Whether he play football or not won’t.


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## NCHillbilly (May 20, 2022)

I quit sports early on because there were real and important things in my life I wanted to do more instead of wasting all my time on playground games. Maybe he is the same. I don't really understand the importance that folks attach to "sports" compared to other things that are much more fulfilling and meaningful.


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## JB0704 (May 20, 2022)

NCHillbilly said:


> I don't really understand the importance that folks attach to "sports" compared to other things that are much more fulfilling and meaningful.



I've made some posts in here about it but, I think sports can provide just as many  meaningful life lessons, possibly more, than hutnin', fishin, running trap lines, etc.  PRolly ought start a thread on it.

I want to add that a lot of parents completely ruin the chance for sports to be meaningful by thinking their kid is better than they actually are, and always blaming the coach when things go south.   The focus is always on the worng things.


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## KS Bow Hunter (May 20, 2022)

There has been a lot of good advice in this thread.  At the end of the day, you do need to talk to the kid if no one else is, not because of football, but because of whatever else is going on.  Not to push him to play ball, but because there is something going on...

At his age, in this environment, after 2 years of insanity and lockdowns, with the issues his parents might have, there is no telling what might be going through the head of a kid his age.

It's less about football and more about what is going on in his head.

I have a niece who was one of the top softball players in the nation.  Had D1 full rides.  But, she was burned out, wanted to become a nurse, and loves living in KS duck hunting, deer hunting, and hanging out with her boyfriend.  So she hung up her cleats.  Done after 2 years of college ball at a JUCO.  She could not be happier.

My son has played 7 years of football and won 3 championships.  He's had an amazing ride.  But high school ball is about to be a lot harder, and he has 0.00000% chance of playing college and less of playing in the NFL.  Unless he is a kicker or a coach.  So I want him to play, if he wants to play, but I also don't want him to get hurt like I did and pay for it the rest of his life.  Football is hard on your body and I only played through high school.

Those saying they don't get it and sports isn't that important, well, they don't get it.  There is nothing quite like team sports and winning, and learning to work hard and be part of a team.  You've either done it and it clicked, or you didn't.  High school football was an amazing part of my experience and one of the best memories of my life.  What I learned on that field has never been lost.  Never will.  

I rowed in college, and that's another sport, totally different that is pure magic when it's all working right.  8 kids moving a shell with grace and finesse without a sound is something you just have to experience to understand.  

Discipline and character are built in sports.  Not the only place, but certainly one place...

We only get one chance to play kids games, and at some point we have to grow up and hang up the cleats.  Most all of us wish we could have played longer.  Quitting now is likely going to stick with him forever...and so will powering through whatever is bothering him.  If he can.  

Talk to him and get him some help.  I have a friend in my Sunday school class whose daughter is in outpatient treatment and whose nephew just committed suicide.  All revolving around social pressures from friends, and probably family.  

Talk to him...


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## NCHillbilly (May 20, 2022)

KS Bow Hunter said:


> There has been a lot of good advice in this thread.  At the end of the day, you do need to talk to the kid if no one else is, not because of football, but because of whatever else is going on.  Not to push him to play ball, but because there is something going on...
> 
> At his age, in this environment, after 2 years of insanity and lockdowns, with the issues his parents might have, there is no telling what might be going through the head of a kid his age.
> 
> ...


I played baseball on a serious level. I was good at it. I was on three championship teams. I get it. At the end of the day if you follow it to it's conclusion, it's still grown men acting like kids chasing a ball around a playground. And it takes over your whole life and all your spare time. I dropped it and focused my time on hunting, fishing, playing music, family, and working. Your mileage may vary. I don't miss it.


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## JustUs4All (May 20, 2022)

I have room for those who admire and appreciate organized sports and for those who don't.  No matter which side of this issue one falls on the important matter here is the health and well being of the youngster right now.  An Uncle can be a help but the focus should be on the health and well being of the youngster, not on whether he plays any particular sport.  Without a good understanding of what is going on, it would be very easy to do more harm than good.


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## KS Bow Hunter (May 20, 2022)

NCHillbilly said:


> I played baseball on a serious level. I was good at it. I was on three championship teams. I get it. At the end of the day if you follow it to it's conclusion, it's still grown men acting like kids chasing a ball around a playground. And it takes over your whole life and all your spare time. I dropped it and focused my time on hunting, fishing, playing music, family, and working. Your mileage may vary. I don't miss it.


OK.  That post wasn't directed at you or anyone other than the Uncle...I hope whatever is happening with the kid gets sorted out...and most of us would have played as long as we could have, and look back on it with very fond memories...my point is he will likely regret it or it will become a defining moment in his life.

I snapped my right femur in two in October of my junior year.  I was told my football was over.  I said like heck it is.  I started working out 2 weeks after it happened, 4 days after I got out of the hospital in traction.  Not only did I play again, starting linebacker and defensive captain, as well as starting offense and playing special teams, I ran track the following spring.  I didn't win much, but I was back on my sprints and hurdles because I was going to play ball my senior year.  And I did.

I had D3 scholarships and chose to get an engineering degree instead of following football...and don't regret it at all.  But I would have regretted not fighting to get back on the gridiron my senior year...and playing with the boys I'd grown up with...and boy what that taught me falling over hurdles because my legs wouldn't do what I wanted them to...but I got up, picked off the rubber, and kept going...I'll never forget.

There isn't much that builds character like sports and the military in our world today...IMHO.

But you are correct, YMMV and everyone has to make the call for themselves.  Based on what the uncle wrote, I'd be pretty worried about the kid myself...


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## NCHillbilly (May 20, 2022)

KS Bow Hunter said:


> Based on what the uncle wrote, I'd be pretty worried about the kid myself...


Yep, either something traumatic happened at school, or it's just the pressure from his family, who seem to have the attitude that if your life doesn't revolve around wanting to play football that you then logically must be a queer. That's one of the stupidest things I've ever read on here, and that's saying something.


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## NCHillbilly (May 20, 2022)

JustUs4All said:


> I have room for those who admire and appreciate organized sports and for those who don't.  No matter which side of this side issue one falls on the important matter here is the health and well being of the youngster right now.  An Uncle can be a help but the focus should be on the health and well being of the youngster, not on whether he plays any particular sport.  Without a good understanding of what is going on, it would be very easy to do more harm than good.


Well said. The kid not wanting to play football isn't a crisis. The kid suddenly making a 180* turn in his behavior and not talking to anybody about it is a red flag.


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## JB0704 (May 20, 2022)

NCHillbilly said:


> .....or it's just the pressure from his family, who seem to have the attitude that if your life doesn't revolve around wanting to play football that you then logically must be a queer. That's one of the stupidest things I've ever read on here, and that's saying something.



That part made me feel bad for the kid.  Earned a Billy thread too.


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## 1eyefishing (May 20, 2022)

I bet in the absence of family pressure he will find his way into something he enjoys.
My youngest excelled at Little League Baseball. On base percentage greater than .600... Later an often leading scorer in community league basketball (his grandpa and I were big ballers; disappointing when he decided to hang it up). The high school football coach loved him as a wide receiver, but my son wasn't enjoying himself. He now carries a golf handicap you can count on one hand and is looking to make $200k this year.
Sometimes it's best not to try to make them fit a mold.
2 cents...


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## BamaGeorgialine (May 20, 2022)

NCHillbilly said:


> Yep, either something traumatic happened at school, or it's just the pressure from his family, who seem to have the attitude that if your life doesn't revolve around wanting to play football that you then logically must be a queer. That's one of the stupidest things I've ever read on here, and that's saying something.


Well, if he continues to play football and is a queen then he has a really great shot at playing for the Dawgs. Just kidding, just kidding. That one has been sitting on a tee for days now. I had to point it out!


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## Howard Roark (May 21, 2022)

Madsnooker said:


> I went thru this with my oldest son. Played AAU basketball ball for years and was really good. He was good enough to play college ball but one day after practice his senior year on the way home he says Dad, I'm not going to college. I'm also done with Basketball. Needless to say I was crushed, upset, mad, confused????? Thankfully I only responded with, we will talk about it tonight. After I dropped him off at home I left to get my thoughts together as well as call a couple of people I had great respect for for additional advice. That night I told my son that I was proud of him and I would support him no mater what he decided. I know that was not what he expected me to say that night 7 years ago but I could tell a mountain was lifted from him that night. He never looked back. He graduated hs and within 3 years started his own site work business and is doing better then I could have ever imagined for him.
> 
> My advice, and that's all it is, let go of the idea that football is his path to success becuaes in reality that's only true for 1% of anyone that ever strapped a helmet on. Instead love on him as his Uncle and tell him you are proud of the football player he was but now your excited to see what the next chapter in his life holds. That reaction will do way more for your relationship with him then trying to fix the situation in your eyes. It also might allow him to reveal what's really going on as well?



This is not good advice, it’s GREAT advice!


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## kingfish (May 21, 2022)

Long story short, good buddy of mine has a son who was a very talented baseball player.  Son had worked his way up to second string catcher in his 2nd year of college and decided he was done, no more baseball.  His dad was devastated .  Sat down with his son and had "that talk".  Son said all he wanted to do was finish school and start his own handy man company ( the kid has a talent for fixing things).  Dad told him he was behind him 110 % as long as he put the same effort in to his new business as he had in baseball.  The son told me that was the easiest thing his dad ever asked of him.  So far it's working out, the kid is booked out about 8 months with work and is making really good money.  I really believe that an athlete's mentality is different from a regular person, and a huge advantage even if it's not on the field.


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## Throwback (May 22, 2022)

mallardsx2 said:


> I quit baseball cause it cut into my turkey hunting.
> 
> I didn’t have much potential in baseball anyhow because all of the coaches and assistant coaches kids got to play wherever they wanted , whenever they wanted. Lol


Yep. That’s why I quit baseball and I was pretty good. Got a new coach and he wanted his son to pitch, his buddies to play the other positions, etc.


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## Throwback (May 22, 2022)

I wish all the people in my life when I was younger who “knew what was best for me” had kept their mouths shut.


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## BuckNasty83 (May 22, 2022)

Went through this with my son last year (sophmore year). My son plays football,  wrestles, and runs track and excels at all 3. I thought he was bluffing when he said he wanted to quit all sports. He wasn't.  I, along with the family was crushed. It's a tough situation to be in, but at the same time,  I didn't want him to play for me. I wanted him to because he wanted to. Too many kids grow up playing to please their parents and I've always let him know where I stood with that.  

I told him I didn't support the quitting part,  but would support his decision regardless. Made sure he understood the consequences and impressions he would leave on his teammates and coaches. The risk of getting behind in the game mentally and physically,  and losing the trust of his coaches and teammates. Let him know I thought he would regret it, but I also let him know it was ok to walk away and I would support whatever he wanted to do.

He quit everything last season,  but spring practice started 2 weeks ago and guess where he's been? Back on the football field. 

Give him time and let him sort things out on his own terms. You never know, maybe he'll find his way back to the field. Kids at this age have a lot of things going on that we easily forget about. Maybe its friendships,  maybe its girl problems,  maybe he's depressed,  maybe he's burned out,  maybe he don't want to compete,  maybe he's intimidated,  maybe he wants attention outside of football, maybe it's too much pressure.  It could be any number of things. Maybe he is just done and as bad as it sucks,  don't beat him up about it. Just support him and be there for him. Never too early to get a headstart on plan B. Last thing you want,  is him playing for the wrong reasons.


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## Oldstick (May 22, 2022)

There is a huge difference in youth sports today than when I was a kid in the 1960s. Until High School, there weren't that many kid's sports leagues around these parts, other than Little League baseball and such.  Today it has turned into a major industry catering to every parent that is certain their son or daughter is an upcoming Olympic champion or pro/college star.  Problem is, the further they advance the more it becomes obvious how high the competition is.  Requiring them to dedicate almost their entire life to practice, training, traveling tournaments, etc. etc.  Sometimes at the sacrifice of their academics, social life, etc.  Some kids come to the decision they don't want live a life as that college sports star bad enough.


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## Pig Predator (May 22, 2022)

The OP hasn't responded or logged in since post 8 of his thread.  Hes got lots of advice to ponder upon when he logs back in....he even mist his own useles Billy dedication thread, smh. Some people.... at least the guy in the porkypine thread is keeping up...


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## Throwback (May 22, 2022)

On second thought give him a good cussing out. That should motivate him


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## alphachief (May 23, 2022)

Don’t worry about him playing football.  Just focus on making sure that the kid is healthy and happy.  That’s ALL that matters.


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## mizzippi jb (May 23, 2022)

Throwback said:


> On second thought give him a good cussing out. That should motivate him


What would Kirby do...


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## kmckinnie (May 23, 2022)

Throwback said:


> On second thought give him a good cussing out. That should motivate him


Recruit him to Auburn ! They don’t want to play ball either. ?


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## kmckinnie (May 23, 2022)

My 1st post in here. ^^


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## Danuwoa (May 23, 2022)

I would just listen to him before I told him anything.  I can tell you from experience that adults ruin sports for kids more often than anything else that can ruin it.  From coaches to parents.  Adults are usually the problem.


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## 4HAND (May 23, 2022)

kmckinnie said:


> My 1st post in here. ^^


And it was a humdinger.


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